BRM Reviews the 2/25/2019 Raw (HORRENDOUS... but at least Roman Reigns is healthy)

[Big Red Machine]

ROMAN REIGNS PROMO- Maybe I’m being hypercritical or overly sensitive, but making playing a whole video package out of Roman’s initial announcement feels in and of itself exploitative.
Anyway, Roman gave a very nice speech, ending with the news that his cancer is in remission and he is “back.” HOORAY!

Okay… now that we know Roman’s coming back, I want to take the opportunity to bring something up that I’ve been mulling over since the night Roman announced his leukemia. I didn’t bring it up that night because I didn’t think it was either fair or appropriate to nit-pick his speech in such an emotional situation and because the fact of the matter was that at that point no one knew if he would ever be back so I wasn’t totally sure this would be something that would turn out to matter. Now that we know he’ back however, I certainly have no problem criticizing WWE for leaving it in their “Roman has cancer” recap package that I mentioned earlier.
During his speech announcing his cancer Roman said something that really bugged me from a meta-perspective, and that was his comment about having “lied” when he was playing tough guy on TV and that his name is really Joe. While it’s true that Joe Anoa’i has leukemia, doesn’t Roman Reigns have leukemia, too? That’s why he vacated the title and left the active roster for four months, isn’t it? If I checked in a kayfabe history book, isn’t that what it would say? It’s not like the guy giving the cancer speeches is Joe Anoa’i, and when we return from commercial “Roman Reigns” is now going to cut a promo telling us he’s been out with a broken arm due to a backstage attack by Braun Strowman and then never mention the leukemia again, right?
So why was all of “Roman Reigns’” talk every week about being a tough guy “lies?” Joe Anoa’i has put cancer in remission TWICE now. Every bump Roman Reigns takes, Joe Anao’i feels because they share a body (I mean… if Roman has to leave to get, for example, liver surgery or something and they write him off TV with an arm injury angle then one has an injury that the other does not, but for the most part, anything that happens to Roman happens to Joe and the other way around). Is Joe Anoa’i not a tough guy, too, like just Roman Reigns?
I realize that all of this probably comes across as either a crazy nit-pick or pointless philosophical ramblings, but as a fan who likes kayfabe kept during the course of a wrestling show, being told flat out that everything is a lie bothers me and takes me out of the mood. Every time they play that video package in the future to push the “Roman’s incredible return from cancer” storyline (which is a perfectly fair storyline in my opinion) it will remind me that the wrestling is all “fake” and doesn’t really matter when you compare it to something real like cancer. You can say “too bad, pal. This is a real situation here,” and you’re entitled to that response, but the point I’m trying to make is that I think in a situation like this, you don’t have to put kayfabe on hold because the situation is the same both in kayfabe and as a shoot… and in this particular case, I think doing so sells Joe Anao’i- not Roman Reigns but Joe Anoa’i- short.

Okay… will someone PLEASE shut the announcers up? Just let me see Roman having his individual moments with the fans. Michael Cole using the same f*cking tone of voice to say “we weren’t sure if we would ever see Roman Reigns again” that he would use (and probably did use) to say the same thing about Kurt Angle after Drew McIntyre kicked Kurt’s ass a few months ago somehow still manages to take this whole thing that I know is real and make it feel fake. And WWE is probably the only promotion in the world that has this problem. That’s how bad their damn announcing is, and Cole, Graves, and Renee (in that order) are the chief culprits. Even Saxton would probably manage to sound more real than fake in a situation like this.

They’re advertising Ronda Rousey & Nattie vs. Riott Squad for tonight. WHY IS THIS FEUD STILL HAPPENING?! I just saw Ronda overcome Ruby last week even though Liv & Sarah interfered in the match, so why the hell would I think the Riott Squad has a snowball’s chance in hell of winning two-on-two if they can’t win three-on-one (which is how Renee pitched it to us)?

Okay, obviously the Roman thing was an exceptional situation that had to be addressed in the manner it was, but I definitely would not have put Aleister Black and Ricochet on right after it, with each guy getting a full video package during this entrance. The show is almost half an hour old and it feels like nothing has happened yet and I’m still sitting through video packages. I probably would have followed it up with a Seth Rollins backstage promo leading to some sort of angle with Galloway to keep people tuned in, the plugged this match for later on in the night. “This match,” by the way, is…

ALEISTER BLACK & RICOCHET vs. THE REVIVAL- 5/10
The Revival, the TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS, did not even get their entrance shown. The first time we saw them was running in from behind on Ricochet & Aleister while we were still on a split-screen so we could also watch Ricochet’s video package.
The match was good for the time it got, but The Revival lost yet again. Does anyone else get the feeling that Vince has decided to turn the tag team division into one giant opportunity to troll hardcore fans? First he finally puts the tag titles on The Revival… then he calls up four of NXT’s top guys, takes the two in a fantastic program together and rushes their story to a point where they are comfortable teaming up and has them beat The Revival. Then the next week he sticks the other two in the go-nowhere tag team division and has The Revival lose to them as well. This has to malicious, right? There is no other explanation for it.

CHARLY CARUSO INTERVIEWS BARON CORBIN- They bring up comments Corbin made about Roman’s leukemia and they start building up that match. Corbin excused his comments by saying “it was an emotional night for all of us” and that he had the “stress of being Raw General Manager” weighing on him as well, to which Charly flat-out asked him (paraphrasing because my DVR is acting up and I can’t rewind, but it’s pretty close) ‘are you saying being GM of Raw is tougher than Roman’s battle with cancer.’
Look. There is “Roman makes an amazing comeback from cancer and now must fight his way to the top to reclaim the title he was forced to vacate” which I think is a perfectly valid story to tell (and one I even proposed they use for Daniel Bryan last year). Using it to get heat on heels by comparing things to Roman’s battle with cancer is, in my opinion, crossing a line into negative exploitation.
Also… what do you think are the odds that Charly (or some other interviewer) asks Dean Ambrose similar questions? I’m betting they’re pretty low.

SNOOP DOGG DELIVERS A BIRTHDAY MESSAGE FOR RIC FLAIR- just wanted to let everyone know that this happened.

They showed us an interviewer with Shawn Michaels and Johnny Gargano at the “red carpet” for Ric Flair’s birthday party. You know that the only f*cking reason they wasted time and money on this is because there was a red carpet last night for the Academy Awards. I wonder what it’s like to just be able to waste money and time like that without a care in the world. That must be nice.

THE DRIFTER TRIES TO SING- bad
But he gets interrupted by Lacey Evans doing her random walk down the ramp and back. This was even more annoying than usual as I think Lacey Evans and The Drifter would probably have a very entertaining segment together.
Then The Drifter got interrupted by Dean Ambrose. He’s all happy, talking about the positive vibes being given off by tonight’s happy news. This would be the same Dean Ambrose who two months ago was telling us all that Roman “deserved” his cancer. Then again, if they’ll ignore The Ultimate Warrior making comments like that then why not Dean Ambrose?
Dean wants a no DQs match against Drew McIntyre tonight. He does comedy with The Drifter, who tries to attack him but then gets laid out. Then the Riott Squad came out for their match against Ronda and Nattie, just to get one more piece of entrance music into this segment.

RONDA ROUSEY & NATALYA vs. THE RIOTT SQUAD (w/Liv Morgan)- 3/10
Heat on Nattie, hot tag to Ronda, Ronda beats the whole Riott Squad up by herself… then Becky Lynch shows up and attacks Nattie with a crutch for the DQ. How is Becky not a heel? Nattie hasn’t done a damn thing to her. She could have charged at Ronda if she wanted to, but she chose to attack Nattie.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- meh
Security swarmed Becky, but Ronda got over to her and nailed Becky with the crutch a few times. Retribution for Becky’s cowardly assault at Elimination Chamber. The cops arrested Becky while Ronda was barely able to restrain herself from attacking road agents and referees. Well… at least Ronda has learned from her suspension. Hopefully Becky will, too.
Do you think Vince will ever learn that having Michael Cole tell us that Becky is a “rebel” only kills her credibility as one?

RONDA ROUSEY & STEPHANIE MCMAHON SEGMENT- interesting
After a commercial break, Ronda demands Vince McMahon’s presence because sick and tired of this crap. Instead she gets Steph. She asks Steph to reinstate Becky so they can have their match but Steph tells Ronda that “being reinstated is the least of {Becky’s} problems right now” because “Becky Lynch has been arrested.”
Is it, though, Steph? It’s only a problem for her if charges are pressed, and the people in charge of that in this case would be Nattie (and assault victim) and WWE (the trespassing victim). Nattie is a babyface wrestler so she would probably rather kick Becky’s ass herself than press charges so if you want to drop the charges and reinstate Becky so she can fight Ronda, there really isn’t much of anything stopping you.
Ronda had the exact same though as me, but Steph told her “it’s not that easy,” then said “I don’t know how many times we have to go through this: Your opponent at WrestleMania is Charlotte Flair.” This line right here is either evidence that Hunter & Steph were in with Vince from the beginning (at which point why would they even make a show of reinstating Becky just for a phony apology?) or that Steph and Hunter have bowed to Vince’s wishes, which is the sort of thing that really deserves some TV time devoted to why they made that decision.
Steph says that “Becky Lynch is a victim of her own actions,” which is a completely true statement. Ronda tries to appeal to Steph on several fronts. First she says that letting Becky into the WrestleMania match is “best for business.” While it may be true that letting her into the match is best for business, I think it would be best to use this situation to create some sort of situation where Becky is at least under house arrest until WrestleMania because, as we’ve seen several times now, Becky is more than happy to assault her opponents with weapons, not giving a sh*t about whether she injures them, which would jeopardize the Mania match (or has Ronda already forgotten that Becky nailed her in the head several times with a crutch at Elimination Chamber? Any one of those shows could have resulted in a concussion which could have kept her out of action until well after WrestleMania. After all, Alexa Bliss! suffered a concussion in September and was out of action until the Royal Rumble.
Ronda then tried to appeal to Steph by bringing up that this would be the first women’s main event in WrestleMania history. Their insistence on this point, of course, runs counter to how they hyped the women’s title matches at last year’s show and runs counter to their general trend if calling any big title match at WrestleMania a “main event,” but we’ll ignore that at the moment. We’ll give them the fact that this match would be the first real women’s “main event” of WrestleMania… but from a kayfabe point of view, I see no reason why Charlotte Flair vs. Ronda Rousey for the Raw Women’s Title on its own isn’t a big enough match to go on last. While the first women’s main event I WrestleMania history is surely important to Steph personally and to her “legacy” (as Ronda put it), I doubt that Becky’s specific participation is really that important to Steph.
Ronda then asked Steph to “think about what this means to your three daughters.” Steph responded to this by viciously assaulting Ronda for daring to mention her children. Just kidding. Steph doesn’t do this because unlike her brother- and Becky Lynch, for that matter- Stephanie is capable of acting in a reasonable and controlled manner.
Steph tells Ronda that she’s sorry but she can’t do it. Ronda gets angry and tells that that isn’t good enough and demands that Steph “reinstate Beck Lynch for the Raw Women’s Title match at WrestleMania NOW” I thought Ronda’s insistence on mentioning the fact that this should be a title match felt kind of forced; like it was something she said in an effort to plug the PPV rather than because it was natural to say at that point in time, because based on how angry she is right now and what Becky just did, my guess would be that Ronda Rousey doesn’t really care about defending her title against Becky right now so much as she just wants to fight her and kick her ass.
And then it hit me: That’s the solution right there. Becky must be punished for her actions, so you punish her by taking her title shot away, but still having her in the match. You just add a stipulation that if Becky wins, the title doesn’t change hands. (And out of kayfabe, the way this all works is that Becky can fume about this for a few weeks but then accept it, pointing out that it doesn’t really matter who is carrying the belt around. If she kicks Charlotte and Ronda’s asses, everyone will know that she is the best; that she is the one who deserves to be called champion. Charlotte should be happy with this, and you can have Ronda conflicted about it but she’s still defending her title and still gets to fight Becky in the main event of WrestleMania. Then, right before the match (or maybe even on the go-home Raw if you really feel you need to do it before the PPV) you can have Ronda decide that it’s not right that someone should have the possibility of beating her fair and square but not walking out the champion, and she stands up to the McMahons and threatens to no-show WrestleMania unless they get rid of the “the title can’t change hands if Becky wins” stip.

Steph gets upset that Ronda “demanded” that she do something and condemned Ronda with the same “you have a bad attitude” and “you think you’re bigger than the WWE” speech. Ronda becomes the first wrestler to actually stand up to a McMahon “I am the boss, dammit” speech in quite a while, and- although she didn’t outright say it, which is probably part of the reason for scary lack of reaction it got- Ronda basically threatened to vacate the belt because not letting Becky into the title match would make the belt meaningless and only for the “chosen” rather than being accessible to anyone able to earn it.
With this MASSIVE cliffhanger we cut a commercial, and when we returned, we saw…

STEVE AUSTIN’S BIRTHDAY MESSAGE TO RIC FLAIR- That really doesn’t seem like something we should be following up on right now.

HUNTER & STEPH WALK AROUND BACKSTAGE, HOLDING THE BELT- They look contemplative and confused. Corey Graves then tells us that “nobody knowns what this means. What is Ronda Rousey doing right now?” Part of me wants to yell at Graves for insisting that Ronda’s actions are incomprehensible and mysterious because I immediately understood what Ronda did and I’m sure a good portion of the audience did as well, but on the other hand, Ronda did not do a good job of explaining what she was doing and the live crowd clearly didn’t seem to get it, so maybe the majority of viewers don’t and Graves isn’t out of line at all.

JINDER MAHAL (& THE SINGH BROTHERS PROMO)- He’s upset that he wasn’t invited to Flair’s birthday party (yes, really) so he runs down Flair and then challenges “any Superstar™ who was invited to Ric Flair’s birthday” to come out and face him in a match. This is dumb, but at the same time if even Renee Young got invited and someone who has won zero main roster titles like Johnny Gargano got invited then not inviting former WWE World Heavyweight Champion Jinder Mahal does seem like kind of a dick move. I mean… I get that they’re probably not friends, but I don’t really see Flair and Gargano as friends, either.

KURT ANGLE vs. JINDER MAHAL (w/the Singh Brothers)- 0.5/10
Am I the only one who is annoyed by fans doing the “YOU SUCK!” chant during Kurt’s entrance when he’s a babyface?
They had a short match during which Jinder got the heat via distraction from the Singh Brothers, did a bunch of headlocks, then went for the Khallas but Kurt reversed, hit his German Suplex, locked in the Angle Lock and got the win. My big takeaway from this match is that someone needs to tell Renee Young to tone her partisanship down. She was so dismissive of Jinder here that I actually began to root for him to beat Kurt Angle just to see Renee with egg on her face.
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- This was simple and would otherwise barely even be worth mentioning, but I gave this its own header just to express my displeasure with it. After the match the Singh Brothers tried to attack Kurt one at a time and each took a German Suplex. This did nothing for Kurt and didn’t make the crowd any happier than they were for Kurt having already won the match. Basically, these poor guys were told to take bumps for no reason other than to make them take bumps, and that’s not cool.

They bragged about Nikki Bella winning “Best Actress- Reality Series” at the Women’s Image Awards.” I have two thoughts on this. Firstly, doesn’t calling her an “actress” run counter to the premise of a “reality” series? Secondly, I have never heard of these “Women’s Image Awards,” but if Nikki Bella won one for Total Bellas/Divas, I can only imagine that they are some sort of shame thing where the idea of the award is to bring attention to Nikki’s behavior so that young girls looking for role models will get disgusted by it and be inspired to strive to not being like Nikki Bella. Also, a shout-out to Sarah K. at the PWTorch site for her entertaining reviews of both Total Bellas and Total Divas.

Seriously, though. Cole said that these awards are meant to reward those artists who “dismantle stereotypes.” Have the people making these decisions not seen Nikki’s shows? She fits the rather negative stereotype of “shallow dumb rich woman” to a T.

A MOMENT OF BLISS WITH SPECIAL GUEST FINN BALOR- TERRRIBLE!
Alexa started off by burying Ronda for disrespecting the title, telling her good riddance and selflessly offering herself up to the McMahons as a replacement champion.
Alexa then brought Balor out and congratulated him for winning the IC Title. She then started to hit on him and talk about his “beautiful abs.” So is Alexa’s new gimmick that she is a heel who hits on the babyface guys? Because if so, this a VERY poor use of her talents. Is Vince angry at Buddy Murphy for something so he’s making Alexa hit on dudes in public?
Actually, now that I think about it, this is the second week out of three that a woman has complemented Finn Balor on his abs. When you add in the fact that during that period he also won the IC Title, I think another plausible explanation for some of this is that he recently joined the Creative team. Alexa tried to get Balor to show him her abs but Lio Rush interrupted. This made Corey Graves very angry. So is Graves a Bliss/Balor shipper or does he, too, just want to see Finn’s abs?
Lio says that Balor doesn’t deserve to be IC Champion and Lashley does so he demands that Balor hand the belt over. Balor says that if Lashley wants a title match he should come out here himself but Lio tells us that Lashley is “preparing for Braun Strowman.” Is that a match for tonight? Why the hell haven’t they been advertising that?!
Lio says that because Lashley is getting ready for Braun, he has come out here to get the title back for Bobby in Bobby’s stead, “even if I have to pry it out of your hands myself.” Finn Balor somehow interpreted this as Lio challenging him to a title match “so you can prove that you’re better than Bobby Lashley,” which is not what I got out of Lio’s statement at all. I don’t even know where Balor is getting that last part from, but if he’s stirring sh*t up between Bobby and his friend Lio then that’s kind of a dick move.
Balor badgers Lio into saying he wants a title match, though Lio is coming off like a total babyface here. In fact, he was insistent that he didn’t want the title match until Alexa piped up and said “what’s the matter, Lio? Not man enough to do the job yourself?”
Rush finally accepted, cut a promo on Balor, and said he was going to go backstage and prepare for their match, but Alexa then told him that he wouldn’t have time to prepare because the match is right now. WHAT?! The match isn’t even official yet, so how does Alexa know when it’s going to happen when we still don’t have confirmation that it is going to happen at all?! The other alternative is that Alexa is making that decision right here and right now, but if that’s the case then since when does she have this power? Who ran off to run a football league and made her queen?
This segment was completely f*cking terrible. Finn Balor, the babyface, was a total dick while Lio Rush, the heel, was a completely reasonable human being who knows he screwed things up for his friend Bobby Lashley and is just trying to make it right. Then you have Alexa, who in addition to suddenly gaining booking power (or possibly telepathy to communicate with the McMahons and relay their instructions) for this one segment, has undergone a completely unprovoked, unexplained, and incomprehensible character change. At this point she appears to be a babyface whenever men are involved but a heel when she is dealing with other women. Actually, it’s worse than that. She has suddenly become oversexualized (note her posing routine before taking her seat? She has never done anything like that before this gimmick change) and began slobbering over the men while being conniving and mean when her fellow women are involved. It’s like they gave Jerry Lawler control over her character!

MORE RIC FLAIR’S BIRTHDAY STUFF- WHO COULD POSSIBLY CARE ABOUT ANY OF THIS?!
First Maria Menounos and her dog wished Ric Flair a happy birthday. Then we got to see TITUS O’NEIL getting interviewed in the “red carpet area.” TITUS O’NEIL? REALLY? Okay. Now Jinder REALLY has a right to be pissed off.
Also invited was Sting. No, not the musician, and not Jeff Farmer, either. Sting the wrestler. You know… Ric Flair’s mortal enemy. Because it’s totally normal to invite your mortal enemies to your birthday party. Is Eric Bischoff going to show up, too? Shane Douglas?
Do you know who we haven’t seen on this red carpet? HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN. And his “best friend” Arn Anderson. Yes, I know Arn got fired last week, but my point is that this is theoretically Ric’s birthday party so not inviting his best pal but inviting people who probably barely knows like Titus and Gargano (while also not inviting Jinder) is the sort thing that just doesn’t compute. It makes this all feel fake and staged, when the goal should be to make it feel as real as possible.

WWE INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE MATCH: Finn Balor(c) vs. Lio Rush- 6.75/10
Fortunately both of these guys happened to have their gear on- Balor even had his kneepads on- for a talk show segment- so they don’t have to wrestle in their street clothes. Lio wanted his music played and “a proper introduction,” which is a perfectly reasonable demand, so his music was played… but they didn’t even wait for him to get to the end of the ramp before changing it over to Balor’s music. Even the sound technician is being an asshole to Lio Rush today for absolutely no explained reason. Also being an asshole to Lio Rush today is Renee Young, who, before Balor even did anything other than pull on his jacket a bit, insisted that this was “much better than Lio Rush’s entrance, right?”
Also… while I think I made my displeasure with Alexa’s new direction pretty clear in the above section, more than anything else, I want this show to not be stupid and to make some f*cking sense. If Alexa was so f*cking eager to see Balor’s abs live and up close, you’d think that she would stay at ringside for the match, but instead she just went to the back.
The match was very good for the time it got, with Balor’s knee getting injured and Rush working it over, causing Finn all sorts of problems with his normal offense. Balor won, which was not what I wanted to see after the previous segment.
The real “highlight” here, though, was the commentary. In one of the single lamest lines ever uttered by a pro wrestling announcer (and think of the ground that covers), Michael Cole noted that “Lio Rush is in the drop zone and Finn Balor- on one leg- is going to try to climb to the top rope,” to which Corey Graves responded by saying “it’s going to be more like the ‘fall down’ zone.

Corey and Renee had a brief discussion of Balor pinning Lio to win the title even though Lashley was the champion. Said discussion had Graves saying it was ridiculous while Renee pretty much agreed with him but pointed out that “rules are rules.” If it’s bullsh*t for a title to change hands like that (which it is, by the way) but “rules are rules” then it just makes the company look stupid for booking the match.
(Also did anyone else remember that Lio pinning Lashley was the second time in two and a half months that a babyface won a title by pinning the heel manager in a Handicap Match? Roode & Gable won the tag titles that way when they pinned AOP).

TUCKER KNIGHT & THE ASCENSION BACKSTAGE- so bad it’s good
Raise your hand if you remembered that The Ascension were still employed. Anyone with their hand up right now other than The Ascension themselves is a liar.
The Ascension saw Tucker walking through a hallway alone so they decided to start trouble. They called Otis Dozovic a fat pig who eats cheeseburgers out of the garbage. Tucker told them to be careful because his “little brother Otis” (I guess they weren’t being metaphorical last week) has a “big temper.” I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone’s temper described as “big” before, but because big is kind of the opposite of short, and having a short temper means that you are quick to anger, I guess that means that Otis is a pretty chill guy… which is probably the exact opposite of what Tucker Knight meant.
The Ascension continued to call Otis fat, which, based on last year’s WrestleMania build, means he is entitled to a shot at the WWE Raw Women’s Championship. Charlotte Flair vs. Otis Dozovic, huh. Not how I saw this one playing out.
Tucker Knight’s next line was one for the ages:
“Look… Otis might not be as educated as you two, but I’m telling you: He’s very sensitive, and does not like being made fun of. I’m warning you: Otis is not going to find this funny.”
Sh*t writing, a sh*t delivery, and description that in no way fits the Otis Dozovic we saw in NXT.
Then again, maybe this isn’t the Otis Dozovic we saw in NXT. In fact, it’s apparently not Otis Dozovic at all. It’s just Otis now, and I think Tucker’s last name is gone as well. So either during the call-up process gained a brother, a temper, and a lot of sensitivity while losing his last name about twenty IQ points, or Vince actually called up Heavy Machinery from an alternate reality, and the one from our universe has been sent over there. The sad par tis that, from a kayfabe point of view, it’s the latter that actually makes some sense.
On cue, Otis waddled up, doing a Chris Farley imitation so bad that if I hadn’t heard someone compare the two a few weeks ago and also hadn’t seen Tommy Boy again recently it would never have even occurred to me that he was trying to do a Chris Farley impression. Tucker told him what The Ascension said about him with Otis repeating the first half of each offending word. Then Otis charged at them and smashed both of them into a metal something-or-other in one fell swoop. Otis told them “that’s what you get for messing with Heavy Machinery.” And if you listen very closely at the end, you can hear both Vince laughing and Hunter cringing.

LASHLEY YELLS AT LIO RUSH- This had better be intended to turn Lio babyface. Lashley yelled at Lio for losing then demanded to know if he could trust him not to screw up if he is at ringside for the match against Braun Strowman tonight.

BRAUN STROWMAN vs. BOBBY LASHLEY (w/Lio Rush)- no rating, bad segment
Lashley attacked Braun behind. Braun eventually equalized but because they never calmly went back to their corners like wanted, the referee never rang the bell so we never officially got a match. It just ended when Braun did his big running shoulder tackle on the outside spot. After he hit first Lashley and then Lio with it, his music just played and he went to the back. My guess is that Lashley will get angry at Lio for not successfully pushing him out of Braun’s way. This was one of those stupid situations where you know that the only reason we didn’t get an official match here was they wanted Braun to win but didn’t want Lashley to actually lose, and they thought that jumping a someone from behind but still getting your ass kicked by him in the end wouldn’t hurt Lashley so long as there was no pin or submission at the end of it. These f*cking idiots.

CHARLY CARUSO INTERVIEWS SETH ROLLINS- bad and pointless.
He said the same sh*t he’s said every week for the past month about beating Brock at Mania, then decided to blow off work to go drinking with his buddy Roman. Can we please get some sort of kayfabe explanation for why Seth hasn’t wrestled on TV for weeks?

NO DISQUALIFICAITONS MATCH: Dean Ambrose vs. Drew McIntyre- 5.75/10
They did stuff for a while, then The Drifter came out and attacked Dean. I was about to be furious because I was certain Roman Reigns was going to come out and make the save but he didn’t and Dean got pinned.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- I guess I spoke too soon.
For no reason at all, both Bobby Lashley and Baron Corbin also came out to beat Dean up. But then Seth Rollins came out with a chair… and Roman Reigns soon followed. Because it’s not like Dean said Roman deserved to get cancer or anything.
This is just completely astounding to me. Did anyone remember that quote from Corbin about hoping Roman would “never come back” before Charly brought it up earlier tonight? I’m not even sure Corbin himself remembered it. But I’ll bet you almost everyone remembers what Dean said, and yet not one person- not an interviewer or Seth or Roman or Dean or one of the announcers or some heel looking to stir up trouble- has brought even mentioned it?

NIA JAX (w/Tamina) vs. BAYLEY (w/Sasha Banks)- 4/10
Everyone remember last week when Nia & Tamina tried to attack Sasha & Bayley but were quickly sent scampering away? Well following the example of Ruby Riott, getting their butts kicked by the champions has apparently earned Nia & Tamina a title match. And just in case them getting their butts kicked last week somehow didn’t make you think that Team Samoa had a chance of beating the champions at the PPV, Bayley beat Nia clean here tonight.


RIC FLAIR’S BIRTHDAY PARTY- dumb
Oh my Lord there are a million people on the stage. Did they invite everyone in the company except for Jinder? Or was I actually supposed to believe Renee Young when she claimed there was an e-mail sent out about it?
So the whole roster (apparently minus Jinder) is out on the stage like geeks. Hunter and Steph, of course, get their own entrance (to Hunter’s music).
You know what? I don’t give a sh*t what happens here. Fast forward, fast forward, fast forward… Oh no! There’s a James Bond villain backstage assaulting people!
Big Dave (Batista, not Meltzer…although that would have been quite the swerve, though, right?) goes into Ric Flair’s locker room and closes the door, we hear some muffled sounds, and then he emerges a few seconds later, dragging Ric’s fallen body. Yes… off-screen violence on a pro wrestling show. Also Batista has blue sunglasses (which he is wearing at night and indoors) and also a blue nose-ring. Not sure when he got that, but it looks atrocious.
The whole roster sees the legendary Ric Flair in mortal danger on the TitanTron… and they all just stand there. Dave asks Hunter if he is paying attention to him now. So yeah. Dave is upset about something Hunter said to him four months ago, so he went and beat up Hunter’s friend. I’ve heard that going Hollywood makes you into a drama queen, but this is a whole new level.


Another F*CKING TERRIBLE episode of Raw. It sucked in pretty much every way. Also, Tommaso Ciampa was not on the show, while Johnny Gargano appeared in one soundless segment where the real star was Shawn Michaels. So much for two of our four big new call-ups who BEAT THE RAW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS LAST WEEK.

[Big Red Machine]

According to Meltzer, right after Roman finished his promo, WWE send out a big e-mail blast advertising his t-shirts. Facepalm.

[NWK2000]

I hated the Batista segment. He beat up an old man, who's only crime was celebrating his birthday with his friends, and we're supposed to be happy to see this interloper?

[cero2k]

I hated the Batista segment. He beat up an old man, who's only crime was celebrating his birthday with his friends, and we're supposed to be happy to see this interloper?

Batista is going to be the heel and Triple H the babyface, I think the idea was to make you get pissed off at Batista from day one

[Big Red Machine]

I hated the Batista segment. He beat up an old man, who's only crime was celebrating his birthday with his friends, and we're supposed to be happy to see this interloper?

Batista is going to be the heel and Triple H the babyface, I think the idea was to make you get pissed off at Batista from day one

Hunter being the babyface is weird, though, because he's theoretically supposed to be a heel in the Becky thing. Yet another reason not to do this whole stupid angle with Becky.

[cero2k]

Hunter being the babyface is weird, though, because he's theoretically supposed to be a heel in the Becky thing. Yet another reason not to do this whole stupid angle with Becky.

not at all, Vince is the heel. Hunter thinks what Becky does is 'cool' remember? I think it's weird too, Batista is the returning superstar who's gonna star in Avengers, I don't know why he's the heel....well, i mean, i assume it's Hunter's ego and Batista having to put him over at WM since it's the retirement match

[Big Red Machine]

Hunter being the babyface is weird, though, because he's theoretically supposed to be a heel in the Becky thing. Yet another reason not to do this whole stupid angle with Becky.

not at all, Vince is the heel. Hunter thinks what Becky does is 'cool' remember? I think it's weird too, Batista is the returning superstar who's gonna star in Avengers, I don't know why he's the heel....well, i mean, i assume it's Hunter's ego and Batista having to put him over at WM since it's the retirement match

I actually thought it was Batista who both insisted on being the heel and on putting Hunter over.

You have a point about the Becky thing, but then his interactions with Steph and his not really challenging Vince on it are odd. Just... the whole Becky suspension angle has been a TERRIBLE idea.

[cero2k]

I actually thought it was Batista who both insisted on being the heel and on putting Hunter over.

most likely, he has a good mind about wrestling, but yeah, anyone going against a suit wearing Hunter while the whole family is dealing with Becky is just weird.

[KILLdozer]

I actually figured we'd see some weird thing where Becky attacked Ric Flar so Charlotte would demand her reinstation or some shit.

[KILLdozer]

This is all actually obviously for one last Pic Flair WWE match at Wm instead.

[cero2k]

I actually figured we'd see some weird thing where Becky attacked Ric Flar so Charlotte would demand her reinstation or some shit.

only Ronda can ask for Becky to be brought back, WWE at the ends wants Ronda to be babyface

[KILLdozer]

That ending was horrible! Batista was extremely out of breath and breathing very hard...for what reason? Then when it's all said and done Ric Flair doesn't have a mark on him. Plus those shots of him on the ground were just legitimately hard to watch...in a just bad non kayfabe way.

[cero2k]

I think we also need to note that Charlotte wasn't there for her father's bday party, and if she had, would she had ran after Batista too? is the heel Charlotte going to back up Hunter after Hunter goes after Batista?

[XIV]

Batista as the heel works, because he’s a better heel than he is face. Always was. Following the interaction from the Evolution reunion, Batista has to be the heel in the equation.

Unusual Charlotte wasn’t there. Did nothing to further this angle or be there for this big birthday bash. So, that was a big fail.

I actually liked the Ronda promo and angle with Stephanie. Probably the highlight of the show and the best way to back themselves out of the corner they’ve painted themselves into.

Roman’s return was just fine. I wasn’t too pumped about it though (apart from hearing that he’s healthy which of course was important).

I fail to care about any Ambrose angle because I know he’s going. It makes it difficult for me to care.

[Big Red Machine]

I think we also need to note that Charlotte wasn't there for her father's bday party, and if she had, would she had ran after Batista too? is the heel Charlotte going to back up Hunter after Hunter goes after Batista?

She had a house show to work. Just live David wasn't there because he had to be on patrol. And Megan wasn't there because... um... because she was spitefully uninvited when WWE got really pissed at her husband last week, I assume.

[Big Red Machine]

Unusual Charlotte wasn’t there. Did nothing to further this angle or be there for this big birthday bash. So, that was a big fail.

She's on the other show! She shouldn't ever have been there.

I actually liked the Ronda promo and angle with Stephanie. Probably the highlight of the show and the best way to back themselves out of the corner they’ve painted themselves into.

I agree that it's an excellent way to both point them out of a storyline corner and as a ploy to get fans to like Ronda, but I must ask if you thought the execution was good or just liked the concept?

Roman’s return was just fine. I wasn’t too pumped about it though (apart from hearing that he’s healthy which of course was important).

I felt this way, too. There really isn't anything I want to see him do right now, you can't do the big comeback story ending in him winning the title at Mania because that will 1) be Roman vs. Brock AGAIN and 2) will be him stealing Seth's spot, which would not be a good thing to do, both for Roman's reaction (I don't think he'll get booed, but I think he'll hit that Brock zone where people won't cheer him, either, because they're tired of the way he's being pushed) and will also hurt Seth by exposing him as a "second choice.". And you cna't even do a Shield match because Seth is booked in a big spot.
I get that they're desperate for ratings, but I wouldn't have gotten Roman involved in any angles tonight and would have held him out until the Superstar Shake-Up and start his renewed world title chase there (interestingly, they made the same mistake with Bryan when he returned in 2015).

[KILLdozer]

I thought Charlotte hated Ric Flair? Why would she care or even be there in the first place?

[XIV]

Unusual Charlotte wasn’t there. Did nothing to further this angle or be there for this big birthday bash. So, that was a big fail.

She's on the other show! She shouldn't ever have been there.

I actually liked the Ronda promo and angle with Stephanie. Probably the highlight of the show and the best way to back themselves out of the corner they’ve painted themselves into.

I agree that it's an excellent way to both point them out of a storyline corner and as a ploy to get fans to like Ronda, but I must ask if you thought the execution was good or just liked the concept?

Roman’s return was just fine. I wasn’t too pumped about it though (apart from hearing that he’s healthy which of course was important).

I felt this way, too. There really isn't anything I want to see him do right now, you can't do the big comeback story ending in him winning the title at Mania because that will 1) be Roman vs. Brock AGAIN and 2) will be him stealing Seth's spot, which would not be a good thing to do, both for Roman's reaction (I don't think he'll get booed, but I think he'll hit that Brock zone where people won't cheer him, either, because they're tired of the way he's being pushed) and will also hurt Seth by exposing him as a "second choice.". And you cna't even do a Shield match because Seth is booked in a big spot.
I get that they're desperate for ratings, but I wouldn't have gotten Roman involved in any angles tonight and would have held him out until the Superstar Shake-Up and start his renewed world title chase there (interestingly, they made the same mistake with Bryan when he returned in 2015).

I get that Charlotte is SDLive based.. BUT she's going to be facing the RAW Champion and with so many legends and others booked for her Father's birthday it would have made kayfabe sense for her to be at RAW this week and further the Becky / Ronda angle in some fashion. But she didn't appear and therefore did nothing to further her own angles.

On the Ronda thing... I absolutely enjoyed the concept better than the execution. Had it of been the other way around and Becky was the Champion at this point, I trust that she would have been able to pull this off with more sincerity. Unfortunately, Ronda's promos whilst okay, aren't believable enough yet.

Roman v Brock, no-one wants. Roman stealing Seth's spot would be bad and they cannot do any more angles of people stealing spots. There's one on each show already. (Technically Charlotte is SDLive, so it's all crossed over)

I would have held Roman for Wrestlemania and had him return in some fashion there (possibly where Seth beats Brock and Brock decides to rampage, but Roman appears and saves Rollins and then have Rollins celebrating with Roman to close the segment off). That way if WWE decide to revisit Brock v Roman it can be done, or if they don't it can just be played off as Roman saving his friend Seth. They returned him too early.

[Big Red Machine]

Unusual Charlotte wasn’t there. Did nothing to further this angle or be there for this big birthday bash. So, that was a big fail.

She's on the other show! She shouldn't ever have been there.

I actually liked the Ronda promo and angle with Stephanie. Probably the highlight of the show and the best way to back themselves out of the corner they’ve painted themselves into.

I agree that it's an excellent way to both point them out of a storyline corner and as a ploy to get fans to like Ronda, but I must ask if you thought the execution was good or just liked the concept?

Roman’s return was just fine. I wasn’t too pumped about it though (apart from hearing that he’s healthy which of course was important).

I felt this way, too. There really isn't anything I want to see him do right now, you can't do the big comeback story ending in him winning the title at Mania because that will 1) be Roman vs. Brock AGAIN and 2) will be him stealing Seth's spot, which would not be a good thing to do, both for Roman's reaction (I don't think he'll get booed, but I think he'll hit that Brock zone where people won't cheer him, either, because they're tired of the way he's being pushed) and will also hurt Seth by exposing him as a "second choice.". And you cna't even do a Shield match because Seth is booked in a big spot.
I get that they're desperate for ratings, but I wouldn't have gotten Roman involved in any angles tonight and would have held him out until the Superstar Shake-Up and start his renewed world title chase there (interestingly, they made the same mistake with Bryan when he returned in 2015).

I get that Charlotte is SDLive based.. BUT she's going to be facing the RAW Champion and with so many legends and others booked for her Father's birthday it would have made kayfabe sense for her to be at RAW this week and further the Becky / Ronda angle in some fashion. But she didn't appear and therefore did nothing to further her own angles.

On the Ronda thing... I absolutely enjoyed the concept better than the execution. Had it of been the other way around and Becky was the Champion at this point, I trust that she would have been able to pull this off with more sincerity. Unfortunately, Ronda's promos whilst okay, aren't believable enough yet.

Roman v Brock, no-one wants. Roman stealing Seth's spot would be bad and they cannot do any more angles of people stealing spots. There's one on each show already. (Technically Charlotte is SDLive, so it's all crossed over)

I would have held Roman for Wrestlemania and had him return in some fashion there (possibly where Seth beats Brock and Brock decides to rampage, but Roman appears and saves Rollins and then have Rollins celebrating with Roman to close the segment off). That way if WWE decide to revisit Brock v Roman it can be done, or if they don't it can just be played off as Roman saving his friend Seth. They returned him too early.

None of the legends are brand-specific, and she furthered her own angle with a promo on SD. Also, in hindsight, doing the angle they did would make Charlotte look sympathetic by having her father assaulted in front of her, which would be quite counterproductive.

I don't think Ronda's issue was one of believably so much as not thoroughly explaining to the audience what she was doing. Then again, that might have been the directive, as the announcers also seemed stumped and no one else explained it to us, either (but Alexa Bliss! figured it out, proving that she is the smartest person on the show). I think the fan response was lacking because the people didn't understand what had happened.

I think that even the scenario that you propose for Roman would cause problems because it would appear to be WWE booking Roman to steal Seth's spotlight and would still make Roman the person to ultimately stop Brock (even if it's just the Mania part), even if Seth was the one to take the title from him.

[KILLdozer]

Pretty sure Charlotte hates her father in Kayfabe, unless they changed it up since the last time they were on Television together and I'm forgetting it, it would make sense for her to not be there.