BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

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Big Red Machine
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BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by Big Red Machine » Apr 2nd, '19, 19:17

This show looks bad, stupid, and like a waste of my time, so I'm not going to watch it. Here is what Dave Bath from F4W/WON had to say about it:

Kevin Owens was already in the ring to host The Kevin Owens Show. He wasted no time and brought out his guests Randy Orton and AJ Styles. Owens pointed out that Orton ruined Kurt Angle’s last match on SmackDown against Styles. Orton said he saved the WWE universe from watching a broken down Olympian. He also saved the WWE Universe from watching the match.

Styles mocked Orton for only knowing one wrestling move. Orton only needs one move when it’s as deadly as the RKO. He mocked Styles for working the independent scene and wrestling in high school gyms. He said while Styles was wrestling in front of dozens of fans he was headlining WrestleMania. Styles admitted that Orton was in the WWE while he was on the independent scene. Styles noted Orton was failing drugs tests during that time. This got a huge reaction from the fans.

Orton said since John Cena left Styles became a corporate bitch. Owens immediately stood up and left the ring. Styles and Orton started brawling. Styles went for the phenomenal forearm but Orton countered into the RKO. This was a good segment and the RKO spot looked great.

SmackDown tag team champions The Usos, Ricochet & Aleister Black defeated The Bar, Shinsuke Nakamura & Rusev (w/Lana)

Ricochet and Cesaro started the match and had a great exchange. Cesaro rocked Ricochet with an uppercut. Black got the tag and scored a near fall on Sheamus. The heels took over and isolated Jey Uso in their corner.

Rusev threw Jey into the ring steps and then the barricade. Jey hit a Samoan drop and tagged Jimmy. Jimmy hit a superkick on Rusev for a close two count. Cesaro rocked Ricochet with another huge uppercut. The Usos hit a double superkick on Rusev for the win.

After the match, Alexa Bliss made her way out on the ramp. Bliss brought up The Usos forfeiting their match against New Day last week. Bliss announced that as punishment The Usos defend the SmackDown tag team titles against The Bar, Ricochet & Aleister Black and Rusev & Nakamura in a four-way match at WrestleMania. All four teams started brawling. Black rocked Cesaro with Black Mass and Ricochet hit a dive to the floor.

The IIconics made their way to the ring to address their opponents on Sunday. They noted they already pinned the current women’s tag team champions, Bayley and Sasha Banks. They promised to win the championship this Sunday and make WrestleMania iconic.

The Miz defeated SAnitY in a 1 on 3 handicap match

Before the match, Miz talked about WrestleMania meaning something different to everyone. For Miz, it’s about retribution. Miz fought to make his father proud but now he fights for his honor. He said McMahon has a father so that makes him a son of a bitch. Shane McMahon came out to watch the match.

Eric Young hit a neck breaker for the early advantage. Miz fought back and sent Killian Dain into the ring post. Miz hit the running knees on Dain and Young. McMahon stopped the match and made it a falls count anywhere match.

SAnitY jumped Miz from behind. Dain missed a charge and hit the barricade. Miz and Alexander Wolfe fought into the crowd. Miz slammed Wolfe through a table for a near fall.

Miz and Young fought into the backstage area. Miz scored a two count on Young but Dain broke up the pin. Miz sent Dain into the wall. Miz and Young then fought outside the arena and Miz scored the pin on Young.

Shane McMahon left the arena in a limo. Suddenly a cop car pulled into the parking lot. Becky Lynch stepped out and walked into the arena.

Corey Graves was in the ring and introduced Becky Lynch. She took the mic from Graves and stood on top of the announce table. She answers to the people, not Graves. The crowd broke into a huge “Becky” chant.

Last year, Lynch and Charlotte Flair were friends and Ronda Rousey was about to debut. She said the stars were aligned for Flair and Rousey to headline WrestleMania this year until she slapped Flair at SummerSlam. She fought to get in the main event. She promised the next time the fans see her she’d be the double champ.

EC3, Mandy Rose, Sonya Deville, Andrade, Zelina Vega, Lana, Karl Anderson, Doc Gallows & Shelton Benjamin vs. Nikki Cross, Heavy Machinery, Naomi, The Hardys, R-Truth, Carmella & Asuka Ended Without A Winner

The commentators pushed that this is the largest mixed tag match in history. Everyone in the match is in either the women’s battle royal or Andre The Giant memorial battle royal.

Vega and Cross started off the match. Lacey Evans music hit. She walked out on the ramp and left. Vega gained control and beat down Cross. EC3 and Otis went back and forth. Otis took over and hit the Caterpillar.

Back from break, Naomi took down Rose and tagged in Truth. Truth and Andrade went back and forth. Truth and Carmella broke into a dance break. Suddenly, everyone started brawling and throwing each other over the ropes.

Otis saw Rose and started flirting with her. Benjamin threw out Otis and Cross threw out Rose. Cross got in Benjamin’s face. He walked away but she jumped on his back. They both fell over the top rope to the floor.

Jeff Hardy hit the Twist of Fate on EC3 and Asuka rocked him with a kick. Jeff threw EC3 to the floor. Asuka and Jeff hugged but Asuka then threw Jeff over the top rope.

United States Champion Samoa Joe defeated Ali in a non-title match

Joe was firmly in control and beat down Ali in the corner. He rocked Ali with a hard chop. Ali fought back with a dropkick sending Joe to the floor. He followed up with a suicide dive.

Ali hit a tornado DDT on Joe for a near fall. He missed the 450 splash and Joe locked on the Coquina Clutch for the win. Ali passed out from the hold.

Michael Cole hosted the WWE Championship contract signing in the ring. WWE Champion Daniel Bryan came out with Rowan. Kofi Kingston came out with Xavier Woods and Big E. The fans broke into a huge “Kofi” chant. Bryan signed the contract but held on to it. The fans broke into a “Kofi rocks” chant.

Bryan’s not going to stop Kingston from signing but he’s he going to educate the masses. The fans broke into a huge “Kofimania” chant. Bryan gave the fans a life lesson. He said not to be complacent like Kingston.

Bryan has another life lesson, which is don’t sit back and be a bystander in your own life. He noted Kingston needed to be pushed. Bryan said the way fans chant “Kofi” is the same when they chanted, “Yes” for him. He said the fans feed off of him because they’re parasites. Bryan told Kingston this is the best it’s going to be.

Kingston heard enough and told Bryan to listen. Bryan doesn’t know Kingston. Kingston promises to educate Bryan. He watched Bryan come into the WWE and win the title in two years. He watched and learned.

Kingston hasn’t got a singles title shot at the WWE championship in eleven years but that’s okay because he has it now. Kingston promised to defeat Bryan and become the WWE Champion at WrestleMania. Kingston signed the contract and stared down Bryan.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown

Post by Big Red Machine » Apr 2nd, '19, 20:07

So Alexa is now showing up on SD and booking sh*t? Remember when the McMahons told us there would be "no more absentee management?" Well then why has all of the on-air booking since Fastlane that hasn't involved Vince and Kofi been done by Alexa?

Or is she a McMahon-family spokesperson now? I can't think of any other reason why she would give a sh*t if the Usos forfeited a match to New Day and wanted to punish them for it. And if Vince was so upset by this forfeit then why didn't he do something about it when it happened?

Also, why did Becky show up in a cop car? Does WWE think that if you get arrested the police let you drive the car back when you leave the police station after they book you? Because this is now the second time in seven months such a thing has happened.

And I like how they moved Matt Hardy to Smackdown with zero explanation, just to stick him and Jeff in a f*cking battle royale, while the Usos defend their titles against two guys who have done nothing to earn it and are feuding with the tag champs on the other show, and a bunch of other guys who have done nothing to earn it. They know what condition Matt's body is in. Why are they not giving us Hardys vs. Usos while they still can?
I mean COME ON! If this was what they were going to do with Matt and Jeff at Mania then why did they even move Matt over to SD? The Superstar Shake-Up is two weeks after Mania! Why not keep them on separate shows, have them work together in the ATGMBR to whet our appetites to see them team up again, then move Matt on SD with the Superstar Shakeup?! These morons were faced with two choices:
1. Use an already-existing plot device to tease us with the idea of Matt and Jeff teaming together once again, then use another preexisting mechanism to deliver on the thing you just made us want.
2. Open up a plot-hole by just moving Matt over to SD with no explanation to have him reform his team with Jeff, then tell us all how unimportant they both are by sticking them in the annual participation trophy singles battle royale.

And of course they chose the latter. Because why actually justify the existence of the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royale by allowing it to have some relevance to just one storyline coming out of WrestleMania? No. It's much better to make sure the fans know it's an afterthought so that we can make our own jobs harder every year when we have to lie to them in an effort to convince them it's not, while making sure that the other twenty-six people in the match know that they're nothing but props to get thrown around while Braun Strowman chases two goofball comedians around the ring.

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
This sh*t makes me SO F*CKING ANGRY!
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by KILLdozer » Apr 2nd, '19, 20:58

I know you're gonna say otherwise, such as "well they sure love to act like it!", but I don't think you should feel that way about the "brand split" anymore. It OBVIOUSLY no longer matters at this point. There is so much random criss-crossing over back and forth, that it really doesn't seem to be a thing. This isn't 2007 anymore. No one cares at all anymore so they appears there are NO restrictions at this point.

Sure "what is HE doing here on RAW?!?!" Could be and probably will be your counterpoint...but that's just Heelish Graves saying stuff because those guys are usually face and he's somewhat surprised.

I know, I know "Well if it doesn't apply anymore they should come out and out right say so! YAAAAHHHH!!!!! " , but if it always happens and nothing is ever mentioned of it...what really is there that needs to be said?

I will admit such things such as it's different when someone is suddenly on the other show permanently and they don't even acknowledge it as something new or explain it, and sure, they'll do what they want of sheer pug-headedness and laziness...but I'm not sure if that's the case here.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by Big Red Machine » Apr 2nd, '19, 21:23

KILLdozer wrote: Apr 2nd, '19, 20:58 I know you're gonna say otherwise, such as "well they sure love to act like it!", but I don't think you should feel that way about the "brand split" anymore. It OBVIOUSLY no longer matters at this point. There is so much random criss-crossing over back and forth, that it really doesn't seem to be a thing. This isn't 2007 anymore. No one cares at all anymore so they appears there are NO restrictions at this point.

Sure "what is HE doing here on RAW?!?!" Could be and probably will be your counterpoint...but that's just Heelish Graves saying stuff because those guys are usually face and he's somewhat surprised.

I know, I know "Well if it doesn't apply anymore they should come out and out right say so! YAAAAHHHH!!!!! " , but if it always happens and nothing is ever mentioned of it...what really is there that needs to be said?

I will admit such things such as it's different when someone is suddenly on the other show permanently and they don't even acknowledge it as something new or explain it, and sure, they'll do what they want of sheer pug-headedness and laziness...but I'm not sure if that's the case here.
If they want to change the rules then that's fine, so long as they tell us first. That's what bugs me about it. You can't ask me to buy into a certain set of rules for how the show works and then expect me to be okay if the rules of the game suddenly change to suit the needs of the story. It's sh*tty writing.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by Serujuunin » Apr 2nd, '19, 21:58

Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 2nd, '19, 21:23
KILLdozer wrote: Apr 2nd, '19, 20:58 I know you're gonna say otherwise, such as "well they sure love to act like it!", but I don't think you should feel that way about the "brand split" anymore. It OBVIOUSLY no longer matters at this point. There is so much random criss-crossing over back and forth, that it really doesn't seem to be a thing. This isn't 2007 anymore. No one cares at all anymore so they appears there are NO restrictions at this point.

Sure "what is HE doing here on RAW?!?!" Could be and probably will be your counterpoint...but that's just Heelish Graves saying stuff because those guys are usually face and he's somewhat surprised.

I know, I know "Well if it doesn't apply anymore they should come out and out right say so! YAAAAHHHH!!!!! " , but if it always happens and nothing is ever mentioned of it...what really is there that needs to be said?

I will admit such things such as it's different when someone is suddenly on the other show permanently and they don't even acknowledge it as something new or explain it, and sure, they'll do what they want of sheer pug-headedness and laziness...but I'm not sure if that's the case here.
If they want to change the rules then that's fine, so long as they tell us first. That's what bugs me about it. You can't ask me to buy into a certain set of rules for how the show works and then expect me to be okay if the rules of the game suddenly change to suit the needs of the story. It's sh*tty writing.
And not only that, but then they go back to the way they were before with not even an acknowledgement, never mind an explanation.

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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by cero2k » Apr 3rd, '19, 04:55

Well, they won't exactly tell you because in two weeks there is a Superstar Shake-Up and they don't want to explain that people can do whatever they want during WM season only.

WM season brings up a lot of stuff that just doesn't make sense.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by Big Red Machine » Apr 3rd, '19, 10:33

cero2k wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 04:55 Well, they won't exactly tell you because in two weeks there is a Superstar Shake-Up and they don't want to explain that people can do whatever they want during WM season only.

WM season brings up a lot of stuff that just doesn't make sense.
Except it's not only Mania season. People have changed shows at other points during the year with no explanation, either.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by KILLdozer » Apr 3rd, '19, 10:36

Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 10:33
cero2k wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 04:55 Well, they won't exactly tell you because in two weeks there is a Superstar Shake-Up and they don't want to explain that people can do whatever they want during WM season only.

WM season brings up a lot of stuff that just doesn't make sense.
Except it's not only Mania season. People have changed shows at other points during the year with no explanation, either.
If it keeps happening without explanation...over....and over....and over...and over...

I don't think it's supposed to matter anymore. Read the writing on the wall.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by KILLdozer » Apr 3rd, '19, 11:07

No way, again...to this face Miz thing. It's like he's been watching old John Cena promos.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by Big Red Machine » Apr 3rd, '19, 12:08

KILLdozer wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 10:36
Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 10:33
cero2k wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 04:55 Well, they won't exactly tell you because in two weeks there is a Superstar Shake-Up and they don't want to explain that people can do whatever they want during WM season only.

WM season brings up a lot of stuff that just doesn't make sense.
Except it's not only Mania season. People have changed shows at other points during the year with no explanation, either.
If it keeps happening without explanation...over....and over....and over...and over...

I don't think it's supposed to matter anymore. Read the writing on the wall.
You say "read the writing on the wall" but the problem is that the writing on the wall still leans the opposite way. If you're booking Smackdown and you've got the choice between Mandy Rose or Nattie, you're going to pick Nattie. They both provide the same... let's say "aesthetic value," but Nattie is a bigger star and is portrayed as a "better" wrestler in kayfabe. And yet they pick Mandy or Nattie every week. Wrestlers not being able to appear on other brands is the mechanism that makes this make sense.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by cero2k » Apr 3rd, '19, 12:29

Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 12:08 They both provide the same... let's say "aesthetic value,"
no disrespect to Natty, she's a beautiful woman, but I'm gonna have to disagree there. Mandy is like Okada, she's just on another level
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by KILLdozer » Apr 3rd, '19, 13:24

Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 12:08
KILLdozer wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 10:36
Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 10:33

Except it's not only Mania season. People have changed shows at other points during the year with no explanation, either.
If it keeps happening without explanation...over....and over....and over...and over...

I don't think it's supposed to matter anymore. Read the writing on the wall.
You say "read the writing on the wall" but the problem is that the writing on the wall still leans the opposite way. If you're booking Smackdown and you've got the choice between Mandy Rose or Nattie, you're going to pick Nattie. They both provide the same... let's say "aesthetic value," but Nattie is a bigger star and is portrayed as a "better" wrestler in kayfabe. And yet they pick Mandy or Nattie every week. Wrestlers not being able to appear on other brands is the mechanism that makes this make sense.
Better wrestler yes, but Natalya is barely starting to reach bigger heights again. Yes, it's due to booking somewhat, but people haven't been into her for a while. What are you referring to btw? Just a hypothetical instance? Lol.

You or I would probably do so, yes, but they're also evidently very high on Mandy Rose so they want her "out there" every single week.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by KILLdozer » Apr 3rd, '19, 14:28

Yeah-a very quick add-on: Natalya is NOWHERE near the status she used to be. This ain't 10 years ago.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by Big Red Machine » Apr 3rd, '19, 15:28

KILLdozer wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 13:24
Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 12:08
KILLdozer wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 10:36

If it keeps happening without explanation...over....and over....and over...and over...

I don't think it's supposed to matter anymore. Read the writing on the wall.
You say "read the writing on the wall" but the problem is that the writing on the wall still leans the opposite way. If you're booking Smackdown and you've got the choice between Mandy Rose or Nattie, you're going to pick Nattie. They both provide the same... let's say "aesthetic value," but Nattie is a bigger star and is portrayed as a "better" wrestler in kayfabe. And yet they pick Mandy or Nattie every week. Wrestlers not being able to appear on other brands is the mechanism that makes this make sense.
Better wrestler yes, but Natalya is barely starting to reach bigger heights again. Yes, it's due to booking somewhat, but people haven't been into her for a while. What are you referring to btw? Just a hypothetical instance? Lol.

You or I would probably do so, yes, but they're also evidently very high on Mandy Rose so they want her "out there" every single week.
What I saying is that, from a kayfabe point of view, why would WWE ever book Jinder Mahal in a random match on Raw when they could book Samoa Joe instead. Or why would they ever book Sonya Deville on SD when they could book Ronda Rousey instead? The Brand Extension creates an explanation for this, so every time that such a thing does happen, it's a sign that the Brand Extension is still in place... which makes the times when its rules are flagrantly violated so frustrating.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by KILLdozer » Apr 3rd, '19, 16:35

Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 15:28
KILLdozer wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 13:24
Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 12:08

You say "read the writing on the wall" but the problem is that the writing on the wall still leans the opposite way. If you're booking Smackdown and you've got the choice between Mandy Rose or Nattie, you're going to pick Nattie. They both provide the same... let's say "aesthetic value," but Nattie is a bigger star and is portrayed as a "better" wrestler in kayfabe. And yet they pick Mandy or Nattie every week. Wrestlers not being able to appear on other brands is the mechanism that makes this make sense.
Better wrestler yes, but Natalya is barely starting to reach bigger heights again. Yes, it's due to booking somewhat, but people haven't been into her for a while. What are you referring to btw? Just a hypothetical instance? Lol.

You or I would probably do so, yes, but they're also evidently very high on Mandy Rose so they want her "out there" every single week.
What I saying is that, from a kayfabe point of view, why would WWE ever book Jinder Mahal in a random match on Raw when they could book Samoa Joe instead. Or why would they ever book Sonya Deville on SD when they could book Ronda Rousey instead? The Brand Extension creates an explanation for this, so every time that such a thing does happen, it's a sign that the Brand Extension is still in place... which makes the times when its rules are flagrantly violated so frustrating.
Or they just don't wanna do that stuff. You know WWE logic lol.
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by cero2k » Apr 3rd, '19, 19:20

Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 15:28

What I saying is that, from a kayfabe point of view, why would WWE ever book Jinder Mahal in a random match on Raw when they could book Samoa Joe instead. Or why would they ever book Sonya Deville on SD when they could book Ronda Rousey instead? The Brand Extension creates an explanation for this, so every time that such a thing does happen, it's a sign that the Brand Extension is still in place... which makes the times when its rules are flagrantly violated so frustrating.
Are you asking why in kayfabe WWE has a roster when they could just use the same ten people over and over again?
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Re: BRM Does Not Review the 4/2/2019 Smackdown (but that doens't stop me from ranting about it)

Post by Big Red Machine » Apr 3rd, '19, 21:00

cero2k wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 19:20
Big Red Machine wrote: Apr 3rd, '19, 15:28

What I saying is that, from a kayfabe point of view, why would WWE ever book Jinder Mahal in a random match on Raw when they could book Samoa Joe instead. Or why would they ever book Sonya Deville on SD when they could book Ronda Rousey instead? The Brand Extension creates an explanation for this, so every time that such a thing does happen, it's a sign that the Brand Extension is still in place... which makes the times when its rules are flagrantly violated so frustrating.
Are you asking why in kayfabe WWE has a roster when they could just use the same ten people over and over again?
I'd replace ten with thirty, but essentially that's the question. And especially so in a WWE-style environment where they want to pretend wear-and-tear exists as a little as possible and want their big stars to wrestle as much as possible.
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