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BRM Reviews wXw Back to the Roots XVI (best angle of the year?)

Posted: Jul 8th, '17, 21:25
by Big Red Machine
wXw Back to the Roots XVI (1/14/2017)- Oberhausen, Germany

16 CARAT GOLD QUALIFYING MATCH: Absolute Andy vs. Marius Al-Ani- 7/10
Two tag team partners- the champions, in fact- beating the crap out of each other just for a spot in the 16 Carat Gold Tournament because the tournament is just that prestigious.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- The tag champs shake hands, but get jumped from behind by CCK. Chris Brookes then cut a promo saying they wanted a tag title shot. Then Andy and Al-Ani got up and ran CCK off. I liked all of this except for that last bit. There was no reason for the babyfaces to get anything that even resembles a small amount of revenge here. The heels should have been kept as strong as possible.

FRANCIS KASPIN vs. EMIL SITOCI- 6.5/10
The story here was Sitoci being a dick, but he still managed to win relatively cleanly.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- Sitoci cut a heel promo claiming to be the best Dutch wrestler in the world. Michael Dante apparently disagreed, because he came out and speared Sitoci twice. This builds nicely for a match next month.

RICO BUSHIDO, KARSTEN BECK, & WALTER SEGMENT- Rico Bushido brings out wXw Director of Sports Karsten Beck. He notes that a few weeks ago we saw wXw Managing Director (and Beck’s heel rival) Christian Michael Jakobi tell WALTER he would be in the 16 Carat Gold Tournament but Beck has apparently reversed this decision even though WALTER is clearly a world-class athlete. Beck answered in German. Rico said he understood where Karsten was coming from, but that that was just “one side of the story” and he asked Jakobi to come out to give us the other. Instead WALTER came out. They want back and forth with long promos in German. Unfortunately, my German is limited to a combination of the things you hear Nazis commonly say in movies and things that have been said by Nightcrawler from the X-Men and the Terran Valkyrie pilot in Starcraft, plus some things extrapolated from Yiddish, so I can’t really tell you what was said, but I could tell that WALTER alleged that Beck’s actions were unprofessional. Things almost got physical between them but Rico Bushido managed to talk them down and got Beck to go to the back. It was definitely intense, though. That transcended the language barrier.

wXw UNIFIED WORLD WRESTLING TITLE MATCH: Axel Dieter Jr.(c) vs. Jurn Simmons- 7/10
They were having a pretty good match with Jurn working over Axel’s back. When Axel finally got on offense Marty Scurll magically took over the wXw-Tron to cut a promo telling Axel “I haven’t forgotten about you” (Axel won the title from Marty at the last show when Jakobi ordered him to defend the belt against Axel immediately after winning it). Marty’s appearance allowed Jurn to size Axel up for a spear but the Axel avoided it and the referee got speared instead. Jurn got a visual pinfall and things proceeded from there, ending in an absolutely perfectly-executed Dusty Finish.

STEEL CAGE MATCH IN WHICH IF MELANIE GRAY WINS, ALPHA KEVIN GETS FIVE MINUTES IN THE CAGE WITH MARIUS VAN BEETHOVEN: Alpha Female vs. Melanie Gray- 5.5/10
Alpha Female beat the crap out of her smaller opponent, throwing her into the cage repeatedly. Melanie got color. Her fiancé, Alpha Kevin came out to show support for her, so Alpha Female started to taunt him while beating Melanie up. Melanie made a short comeback but Alpha Female then started to choke her out. Alpha Kevin couldn’t restrain himself any longer and tried to climb the cage to save his fiancée from this brute who was trying to choke her into unconsciousness, but Marius van Beethoven came up behind him and smashed his injured knee with a chair. When Kevin tried to get up, Marius drilled him right in the head with the chair. The match continued for a bit longer with Melanie getting in a good nearfall or two before Alpha Female put her away. Then this happened…

TOTALLY F*CKING AWESOME POST-MATCH ANGLE- Marius van Beethoven pulled out some handcuffs and handcuffed Alpha Kevin to the outside of the cage. Then he got in the cage and locked the door behind him, using the very chain meant to be used to keep him locked in the cage with Kevin had Melanie won.
Realizing what was about to happen, Melanie charged at Marius and nailed him with a spear, but when she tried to do the same to Alpha Female, Alpha Female caught her in a front guillotine and mostly choked her out so Marius could beat the sh*t out of her right in front of Kevin. That, ladies and gentlemen, is some f*cking HEAT.
Kevin managed to summon up all of his strength and broke free of the handcuffs, and even managed to get the chain off of the door (I guess they don’t make metal locks very well in Germany). He tried to force his way into the cage but Alpha Female blocked his way, and just when it looked like he was about to finally force his way past her, Marius ran over and nailed him with a superkick. Alpha Female stomped a mud-hole in Kevin then choked him out while Marius wiped the blood from Melanie’s forehead onto his own, then put Melanie in a knee-bar, making her scream in pain right next to Kevin. This is probably the best heavy heat angle we’ll see all year.

CAGE BATTLE MATCH: Chris Colen & John Klinger (& Ilja Dragunov) vs. Cerberus (Robert Dreissker, Julian Nero, & Dirty Dragan) (w/Adam Polak)- 8.75/10
This was basically wXw’s version of War Games. “Cage Battle” was the best translation I could find for “Käfigschlacht.” Dragunov was supposed to be in this match and was supposed to be the last guy in for the babyface team but when after he didn’t come out at the appointed time we cut backstage to see that he had been laid out, and Adam Polak came out laughing.
The cage door having been left open for Dragunov allowed the brawl to spill outside of the cage. This also allowed for the introduction of some weapons, which led to a hilarious spot with the babyfaces cornering Dragunov in the cage, resulting in him suffering several from the use of several weapons.
From there weapons poured in and this became one hell of a hardcore match. Cerberus’ numbers advantage eventually allowed them to get the win, with Dreissker making Klinger tap to the same hold that Dreissker used to win this same match for Cerberus last year.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- Adam Polak starts to cut a victorious promo. The fans are chanting for Ilja Dragunov but instead we get Francis Kaspin nailing Polak with a chair, getting his own revenge for being humiliated on a past show (Dragunov apparently this show for personal reasons and the backstage attack was pre-taped), giving the babyfaces some sort of win to show for this unfortunate situation. Polak gets stretchered off, but on his way out tells Dirty Dragan to “take care of them,” so this feud will continue.

A great show from WXW. We got some solid wrestling in the beginning, an unforgettable angle in the Melanie/Kevin vs. Marius/Alpha Female feud, and then an awesome hardcore main event. Check this show out!