BRM Reviews the 3/25/2022 Rampage

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Big Red Machine
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BRM Reviews the 3/25/2022 Rampage

Post by Big Red Machine » Mar 28th, '22, 09:51

DUSTIN RHODES vs. LANCE ARCHER (w/Dan Lambert)- 5/10
Lance Archer beat someone up before the match and carried them out of the tunnel. I assume it was Lee Johnson. I love how this feud has gone from non-existent to “grudge match” in the span of that one video package.”
Excalibur told us that there is “so much animosity between these two men, all stemming from that TNT Championship tournament.” Yes, there is so much animosity between these two has been for almost two years… that they have never mentioned at all. I’m sure the AEW partisans will claim that this is more “long-term storytelling,” but that misses that the second half of that last word is “telling.” If the extent of your “telling” is the announcers just insisting that something is true, you’re not doing it right.
The match was slow and mostly uninteresting, but not actually bad, either. My interpretation of the set-up for the finish was that Dustin was playing possum after wiggling out of the Blackout, but none of the announcers said this. Said finish saw Archer pick Dustin up and drag him over to the turnbuckle he had previously exposed, at which point Dustin pulled Archer into the exposed turnbuckle and rolled him up for the win.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- fine
Archer attacked Dustin after the match. Some of Dustin’s students came out to try to save him but got beaten up. You’d think security would have come out, too, or maybe some kindhearted babyface who has great respect for the veteran Dustin, but they didn’t.

LEXI NARE INTERVIEWS JAY LETHAL- good
Maybe give us some graphics when you’re introducing a new interviewer?
Lethal noted that the only two men to beat him in AEW are Adam Cole and Ricky Starks, and both had to cheat to beat him. He wants his wins back, and he says that “there has to be a better way” (presumably to ensure fair competition). This sounds like a set-up for him to pitch the rebirth of ROH to Tony Khan.

FUEGO DEL SO PROMO- very good, but…
He says “I knew nothing would be handed to me. I’d have to fight for every single thing that I got.” This would be the same guy who was handed a contract right after losing a match where the stipulation was the he would only get a contract if he won. Then he wagered his car in a match and lost it, and his Rich friend Sammy bought him a new one. F*ck off.
He actually cut a TREMENDOUS babyface promo, but the problem is that the booking has given him zero credibility, and the way he started this promo off made him come off like someone who doesn’t understand just how lucky he has been.
He called out the House of Black… and, predictably, got destroyed. As the House of Black were leaving, the Dark Order (well.. minus the women, the guys wrestling reDRagon later, and Colt Cabana) came out to have a stare-down with them. Excalibur told us that this was “interesting” and “worth keeping an eye on.” A lie.

LEXI NARE INTERVIEWS DAN LAMBERT & THE MEN OF THE YEAR- fine
They say that there will be no more open challenges. From now on, anyone who wants a shot at the TNT Title will have to earn one. Is this supposed to be a heelish thing to say? It seems pretty reasonable to me.

reDRagon vs. THE DARK ORDER (Alan “Five” Angels & Preston “Ten” Vance)- 5.25/10
reDRagon won a match that was far too even. They should be dominating these clowns, and they certainly shouldn’t need to turn Ten’s mask around to get a win.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- It’s AEW, so of course there is a post-match attack. reDRagon went after Five, seemingly just so A Boy & His Dinosaur could run out and make the save.

NYLA ROSE VS. THUNDER ROSA VIDEO PACKAGE/PROMOS- AWESOME!
Great stuff here, but anyone upset because Nyla “ruined Thunder Rosa’s moment” is an idiot. Her moment is after she won the title, and she got that. They even showed it in this video package, with Dustin Rhodes coming out to celebrate with her for unexplained reasons. If you want to get upset, get upset about Nyla attacking Thunder Rosa from behind. That’s what the focus should be on, rather than nebulous bullsh*t like she “stole her moment.” (You’ll notice that this sort of nebulous crap was also one of the issues in the Wardlow babyface turn, with the issue there being Spears supposedly “stealing Wardlow’s spotlight”).

MADI WRENKOWSKI vs. NYLA ROSE (w/Vickie Guerrero)- squash

Q.T. MARSHALL GIVES HOOK A CERTIFICATE OF ACCOMPLISHMENT- dumb
He rammed Aaron Solow’s head into the certificate. The reason this failed for me is that the babyface needs to let the heel reveals that it’s a trap first. The babyface should be prepared for it, but not fall into it. That didn’t happen here, and when you have a guy who does heelish things all the time (not letting up on submission when the bell rings) it comes off to me like him being a jerk.
Hook went to leave, but Danhausen came out and cursed him. Hook walked past Danhausen instead of doing what I hoped he would do, which was beat Danhausen into unconsciousness.

MARK HENRY INTERVIEWS THE PEOPLE IN THE MAIN EVENT- fine

FTW TITLE MATCH: Ricky Starks(c) (w/Will Hobbs) vs. Shane “Swerve” Strickland- 6.75/10
This was very good, other than the finish where the referee clearly saw Hobbs throwing Swerve back into the ring. That should have been a DQ.

POST-MATCH SEGMENT- meh
Starks had an entourage that we’ve never seen before and probably won’t ever see again, because their purpose was to be beaten up by Keith Lee for no real reason, making Lee look like a jerk. The show ended with a two-on-two brawl going on. Referees came out to try to break it up, but they failed. Maybe we could send out some of that security we saw on Dynamite? No?

Another mostly meh episode of Rampage.
Hold #712: ARM BAR!

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