BRM Reviews the 9/3/2014 NXT
Posted: Sep 5th, '14, 08:23
In addition to the finals of the tag team #1 contendership tournament, we will also see ALL FOUR of the guys in the main event of Takeover II in singles matches. That is FIVE matches that deserve at least ten minutes each on a one-hour show, plus whatever they do to hype up the Women's Title match, Bull vs. Mojo, and the Hair vs. Hair match. That is WAY too much going on for just a one hour show. One flaw NXT has developed in the past six months or so is that they cram pointless filler matches into the shows, which takes time and focus away from people and angles that need it and doesn't really even do anything for the people featured in the pointless matches, either. This show is already over-stuffed, so they really can't afford any of that tonight.
CHARLOTTE vs. ALEXA BLISS- 0.5/10
OH COME THE F*CK ON! I just type a whole paragraph about how they need to keep things tight and focused tonight and can't afford to have any pointless matches... and then they give me a pointless match with the one thing I have been demanding that they give me for months: More Alexa Bliss. That's just cruel.
Alexa did not do her customary blowing pixie dust into the camera. I guess when Cody Rhodes stole the gimmick, he stole the effect, too. Jerk.
Alexa needs to make "Keep calm and sparkle on" into a catchphrase. Renee Young referred to Alexa as a "sexy Smurf." Those two words should never, ever, ever be uttered in that sequence again.
They went about three minutes. The entire match was Charlotte on offense, Alexa using her flippyness and athleticism to get a roll-up or two. Nothing was bad. It was just simple and short, which is what was needed, because the whole thing was an excuse to get to the...
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- Bayley comes out and cuts a good promo, then offers Charlotte another handshake. Charlotte teases the handshake but pie-faces Bayley instead. Bayley charged at Charlotte and ducked a clothesline. Then, when Charlotte turned around and charged at Bayley, she ran into a very poor-looking Hug-plex. To make matters worse, Charlotte didn't really sell the move at all, almost immediately rolling out to the floor on her feet.
Having Bayley lay Charlotte out with her finisher wasn't a bad idea in theory, but the execution of the move here was so poor it wasn't worth airing any of this (or, unfortunately, the Alexa Bliss match that set it up). They really needed to save time on this show, and we all know that Bayley isn't going over, so why not have Bailey cut basically the same promo she did here in a backstage interview, and then later have Charlotte cut a backstage promo saying that she didn't shake Bayley's hand because she doesn't respect Bayley enough to shake her hand. This will not only save time on this show, but when Bayley loses next week, you can have Charlotte offer a post-match handshake, so that Bayley has still accomplished something despite her defeat.
TYLER BREEZE PROMO- good
SIN CARA & KALYSTO PROMO- good
TYLER BREEZE vs. TYE DILLENGER- 1.75/10
A very short match. Dillenger showed a lot of fire for a guy who is basically a nobody being put on TV to get beaten in three minutes.
TYSON KIDD PROMO- awesome. Classics like these are always great.
KENTA DEBUTS NEXT WEEK!
ENZO AMORE PROMO- HORRIBLE
That little section of his beard that the Frenchmen shaved off last week has already grown back. All of these antics made the babyfaces look like unlikable morons. And that hair-dresser is a moron, too. Why would you give them that hair-removal cream in a giant bucket?
TYSON KIDD vs. ADAM ROSE- 0.5/10
Short.
SAMI ZAYN PROMO- not good. It just felt... off. Like he forgot to turn on his charisma.
THE STILL-UNNAMED INTERVIEWER INTERVIEWS THE VAUDVILLANS- okay
Seriously, though... is it that hard to give this chick a name? How about Stacy Smith? There. See. That wasn't so hard. Or Jennifer Davis. See. I did it again. WWE has people whose job's it is to think up names, so tell those lazy f*ckers to get to work!
SAMI ZAYN vs. MARCUS LOUIS (w/Sylvester Lefort)- 0.5/10
Same as the other matches.
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- terrible!
Colin and Enzo jump the Legionnaires from behind like cowards, then try to dunk Lefort's head into the bucket of hair-removal cream BEFORE the match. Byron Saxton apparently did not watch the earlier video, because he didn't know what was in the bucket.
ADRIAN NEVILLE PROMO- decent
ADRIAN NEVILLE vs. CJ PARKER- 0.5/10
Hey, wasn't CJ feuding with Xavier Woods? Whatever happened with that? You know what... never mind. I don't even care.
NXT TAG TEAM #1 CONTENDERSHIP TOURNAMENT FINALS: Sin Cara & Kalysto vs. the Vaudvillans- 3.5/10
The match was short. The winners had a staredown with the Ascension afterwards.
A bad show from NXT. They did nothing to hype up Bull vs. Mojo, and the hype for the other four matches consisted of short matches that really didn't do anything for anyone, a poorly-executed segment, and some horrible stuff for the hair vs. hair match. Of this entire 58 minutes of TV, the only thing that felt even close worth my time was the tournament final, and that was really only because it decided the #1 contender. A very boring show from NXT.
CHARLOTTE vs. ALEXA BLISS- 0.5/10
OH COME THE F*CK ON! I just type a whole paragraph about how they need to keep things tight and focused tonight and can't afford to have any pointless matches... and then they give me a pointless match with the one thing I have been demanding that they give me for months: More Alexa Bliss. That's just cruel.
Alexa did not do her customary blowing pixie dust into the camera. I guess when Cody Rhodes stole the gimmick, he stole the effect, too. Jerk.
Alexa needs to make "Keep calm and sparkle on" into a catchphrase. Renee Young referred to Alexa as a "sexy Smurf." Those two words should never, ever, ever be uttered in that sequence again.
They went about three minutes. The entire match was Charlotte on offense, Alexa using her flippyness and athleticism to get a roll-up or two. Nothing was bad. It was just simple and short, which is what was needed, because the whole thing was an excuse to get to the...
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- Bayley comes out and cuts a good promo, then offers Charlotte another handshake. Charlotte teases the handshake but pie-faces Bayley instead. Bayley charged at Charlotte and ducked a clothesline. Then, when Charlotte turned around and charged at Bayley, she ran into a very poor-looking Hug-plex. To make matters worse, Charlotte didn't really sell the move at all, almost immediately rolling out to the floor on her feet.
Having Bayley lay Charlotte out with her finisher wasn't a bad idea in theory, but the execution of the move here was so poor it wasn't worth airing any of this (or, unfortunately, the Alexa Bliss match that set it up). They really needed to save time on this show, and we all know that Bayley isn't going over, so why not have Bailey cut basically the same promo she did here in a backstage interview, and then later have Charlotte cut a backstage promo saying that she didn't shake Bayley's hand because she doesn't respect Bayley enough to shake her hand. This will not only save time on this show, but when Bayley loses next week, you can have Charlotte offer a post-match handshake, so that Bayley has still accomplished something despite her defeat.
TYLER BREEZE PROMO- good
SIN CARA & KALYSTO PROMO- good
TYLER BREEZE vs. TYE DILLENGER- 1.75/10
A very short match. Dillenger showed a lot of fire for a guy who is basically a nobody being put on TV to get beaten in three minutes.
TYSON KIDD PROMO- awesome. Classics like these are always great.
KENTA DEBUTS NEXT WEEK!
ENZO AMORE PROMO- HORRIBLE
That little section of his beard that the Frenchmen shaved off last week has already grown back. All of these antics made the babyfaces look like unlikable morons. And that hair-dresser is a moron, too. Why would you give them that hair-removal cream in a giant bucket?
TYSON KIDD vs. ADAM ROSE- 0.5/10
Short.
SAMI ZAYN PROMO- not good. It just felt... off. Like he forgot to turn on his charisma.
THE STILL-UNNAMED INTERVIEWER INTERVIEWS THE VAUDVILLANS- okay
Seriously, though... is it that hard to give this chick a name? How about Stacy Smith? There. See. That wasn't so hard. Or Jennifer Davis. See. I did it again. WWE has people whose job's it is to think up names, so tell those lazy f*ckers to get to work!
SAMI ZAYN vs. MARCUS LOUIS (w/Sylvester Lefort)- 0.5/10
Same as the other matches.
POST-MATCH SEGMENT- terrible!
Colin and Enzo jump the Legionnaires from behind like cowards, then try to dunk Lefort's head into the bucket of hair-removal cream BEFORE the match. Byron Saxton apparently did not watch the earlier video, because he didn't know what was in the bucket.
ADRIAN NEVILLE PROMO- decent
ADRIAN NEVILLE vs. CJ PARKER- 0.5/10
Hey, wasn't CJ feuding with Xavier Woods? Whatever happened with that? You know what... never mind. I don't even care.
NXT TAG TEAM #1 CONTENDERSHIP TOURNAMENT FINALS: Sin Cara & Kalysto vs. the Vaudvillans- 3.5/10
The match was short. The winners had a staredown with the Ascension afterwards.
A bad show from NXT. They did nothing to hype up Bull vs. Mojo, and the hype for the other four matches consisted of short matches that really didn't do anything for anyone, a poorly-executed segment, and some horrible stuff for the hair vs. hair match. Of this entire 58 minutes of TV, the only thing that felt even close worth my time was the tournament final, and that was really only because it decided the #1 contender. A very boring show from NXT.