BRM Reviews ECW Ultra Clash 1993 (Terrible)

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Big Red Machine
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BRM Reviews ECW Ultra Clash 1993 (Terrible)

Post by Big Red Machine » Aug 6th, '12, 20:01

ECW UltraClash 93 (9/18/1993)- Philadelphia, PA

Rocco & Grunge as heels? JASON as a bayface? What type of Bizarro World is this?

ECW PENNSYLVANIA TITLE MATCH: Tony Stetson(c) (w/Hunter Q. Robbins III) vs. Tommy Cairo- 4.5/10

MASK VS. MASK MATCH: Super Destroyer #1 vs. Super Destroyer #2 (w/Hunter Q. Robbins III)- 1/10
This match consisted of about six minutes of some fine technical working over of people’s limbs… then a back senton for the three count. WHAT?

AFTERMATH- good, and it transitioned perfectly into…

SCAFFOLD MATCH: J.T. Smith vs. The Dark Patriot- 5/10
The match was decent but short. After the match, J.T. sold his knee as if he had injured it on the fall. Then The Dark Patriot kept attacking J.T, and at some point while he was being half-dragged around the arena, J.T. stopped selling the leg.
I’m really not sure what the point of the post-match beatdown was. This was the blow-off (what were the chances of Doug staying once his brother had left?), and J.T. was going to be wrestling on the next set of shows, so why have him get beaten down after he had already fallen from the scaffold?
On an ironic note, during the post-match beatdown, Joey Styles says “somebody call 911!”

BUNKHOUSE MATCH: Terry Funk & Stan Hansen vs. Abdullah the Butcher & Kevin Sullivan- 1.75/10
This match was just a lot of hitting each other… and not particularly good hitting each other, either. Funk threw a few chairshots here that could give Lance Storm’s from Barely Legal a run for their money as some of the weakest looking chairshots in wrestling history. The match ended when Eddie Gilbert interfered, causing Funk and Hansen to win via DQ… in a Bunkhouse Match (Joey explained it away as saying that weapons are okay in this match, but interference isn’t- which makes sense, but still felt lame). After the match, Sully and Abdullah randomly started fighting.

MIXED-GENDER BATTLE ROYALE FOR $5,000: Tigra vs. Angel vs. Sensational Sherri vs. Jay “Six Pack” Sully vs. Don E. Allen vs. Hunter Q. Robbins III- DUD!
Stupid and pointless

LOSER GETS HIT TEN TIMES WITH A LEATHER STRAP: Sal Bellomo (w/Sensational Sherri) vs. Richard Michaels (w/Hunter Q. Robbins III)- 4/10

ECW HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH: Shane Douglas(c) (w/Paul E. Dangerously) vs. The Sandman- 6/10
I really didn’t like Sandman’s low blow, especially right in front of the ref. If Sandman didn’t get DQed for going low, then why was Douglas using a foreign object so bad? Other than that, this match was pretty good. The fans sh*t all over it, though.

BASEBALL BAT MATCH: Crash the Terminator & Miguelito Perez vs. The Headhunters- 7/10

Dear G-d I hope they gimmicked that baseball bat (and based on the sound it made when it hit the turnbuckle, it doesn’t seem like they did) because some of those shots were SCARY! TWICE in this match, we had someone take a bump that did major damage to one of the walls… but the camera missed it both times!

Overall, a TERRIBLE show, made even worse by a terrible crowd. If it wasn’t a weapon-shot or in the scaffold, they booed and called it “boring.” The main event was the only thing on this show even close to being worth seeing. Most of this show was boring and repetitive. It felt like everything was “eight minute match, dirty/DQ finish, brawl afterwards.” I believe that the squash at the beginning and Douglas vs. Sandman were the only matches on this show that didn’t have brawls after them. Not a good start for the Paul Heyman Era in ECW. Thankfully, it eventually got a lot better.

Hold #712: ARM BAR!

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ECW Guilty As Charged 1999

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