TNA Lockdown
TNA Lockdown (4/17/2011)- Cincinnati, OH
Come on, TNA. Give BRM a birthday present by actually putting on a good show.
XSCAPE MATCH for #1 Contedership to the TNA X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal vs. Max Buck vs. Jeremy Buck vs. Robbie E vs. Amazing Red vs. Brian Kendrick vs. Suicide-7/10. The bump at the end was weird. A low bow hidden from the ref would have accomplished the same thing without relying on a ref bump-type scenario for the 27th week in a row. I can’t deny that it got heat, though.
Having no bell for the eliminations was a little weird, as was Sabin hitting the Cradle Shock, then using Homicide’s Lariat to get the pin.
BISCHOFF PROMO- No. NO Please tell me he did not just say that Hogan wants the TNA World Title, and that it will happen tonight.
Props to the fans who started the “WE WANT WRESTLING!” chant during this waste of time.
STEINER & CRIMSON PROMOS- GREAT!
STEEL CAGE MATCH: Ink Inc. vs. Scott Steiner & Crimson vs. EY & OJ vs. The British Invasion- 5.5/10
MADISON & TARA SEGMENT- Good stuff, but having Tara at ringside tonight wouldn’t matter anyway, because it is a STEEL: CAGE MATCH- DUD!
WHAT THE F*CK! WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS BLOWOFF FOR SIX MONTHS… AND THEY MAKE IT A SQUASH? WHAT THE F*CK IS WRONG WITH THIS COMPANY? This is STING vs. JEFF II. I am not saying that there were any drugs involved or anything. I am saying that this is a PPV match that has been hyped for a while… and they give us a squash! WHAT THE F*CK!
MATT MORGAN PROMO- Good.
THE POPE vs. SAMOA JOE- 7.25/10. See what happens when you give these guys time?
MEXICAN AMERICA SEGMENT- Okay, whatever. I have no idea what the hell they were saying. The way to do this would have been exactly the way that they stated/ Have Hernandez cut the promo in Spanish, then do the “I’m going to dumb it down for you” line, then have him cut it in English. Instead, a whole bunch of people just grabbed at the mic. Props to Sarita for grabbing the mic away from Rosita when she started sounding like a stereotypical black woman.
STEEL CAGE MATCH: Matt Morgan vs. Hernandez (w/Mexican America)- 6.5/10
SARITA & ROSITA PROMO- BAD! Her complaints are baseless. She hasn’t beaten every Knockout in the company, and there was no bad officiating in the Morgan vs. Hernandez match. Then Velvet Sky, who has no beef with her at all, comes out and shuts her up. This time should have been given to a match.
ULTRA-MALE RULES MATCH: Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Jarrett- 7.75/10. All of the awkwardness with the key and the referee prevented this from being an 8/10.
Ummm… If the first fall is a submissions match, why is the referee COUNTING KURT’S SHOULDERS DOWN? And what the hell was up with the ambiguity about the second fall. The ref should have signaled for the fall right away. The only reason that they did this was so Jarrett could attack Kurt from behind to start the third fall. That was moronic. The stuff with Karen was good, though.
The fact that this isn’t the main event scares me. Usually, when a match that seems like it should be the main event isn’t, it means that booker is doing something that he is unsure if it will go over well, so he doesn’t want to put it on last incase it flops (not that it always does flop: the first Joe vs. Punk draw was done like this).
STEEL CAGE MATCH FOR THE TNA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE: Sting(c) vs. Mr. Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam- I was right. 6/10. I was really enjoying this match until Hogan came down and ruined it. I actually took points away for the transparent swerve and crappy finish.
They’ve spent how much time building this match up… and it only went 8 minutes? And a 8 minute match doesn’t need a f*cking video reacp!
LETHAL LOCKDOWN MATCH: Fortune (Daniels, Kazarian, & Beer Money) vs. Immortal (Ric Flair, Abyss, Matt Hardy, & Bully Ray)- 7.5/10. Just barely scrapes by as a main event. This match didn’t do it for me, and mostly because of Flair. That was the WEAKEST TAPOUT EVER. Anyone who knows the move knows that Roode didn’t even have it locked in correctly! And this wasn’t even a finisher!
Dear Ric, if you don’t want someone to hit you, it is probably a better idea to GET UP AND RUN AROUND, rather than kneeling down and staying in one place.
Flair bleeds a lot. Who saw that coming? And why the hell was Flair wrestling in suit pants? He knew about this match for weeks. BRING YOUR GEAR!
I also didn’t like Matt & Daniels on top of the cage… or I guess I really didn’t like the way the cameras got it. Most of the time they were up there, we weren’t seeing anything in the ring, but were hearing all of the sounds. It just made me feel like I was missing a lot of wrestling
Overall, this show was surprisingly good (for the most part). It was a lot like Genesis. Nothing great, but a lot of stuff that was pretty solid. Much better than the usual drivel from TNA. I am very annoyed at the fact that both title matches utterly sucked, though.
Stupid Announcer Quotes:
1. Just when I thought he had learned his lesson, Taz once again misuses the term “sacrificial lamb.”
2. Tenay- “It’s all about the strikes when it comes to Samoa Joe, isn’t?”- And you and Taz spent the last month building this up as “the ‘Street Style’ of the Pope vs. the ‘Submission Style’ of Samoa Joe.”
3. Taz- “That clothesline with that Back Sweep”- It’s an STO! Anyone who has ever played an SvR game or knows anything about wrestling knows this. Why is this man an announcer?
4. Tenay and Taz up Angle vs. Jarrett as being “the most personal grudge in the history of the business”- Tommy vs. Raven? Raven vs. Sandman? Triple H vs. HBK? HBK vs. Bret? Homicide vs. Corino? Dusty vs. Sullivan? Quack vs. STIGMA? A bunch of others that I am sure I am missing?
5. Taz- “This late in the matchup,. Most guys would be too exhausted to lift a guy up there”- it’s only been ten minutes!
6. Tenay (after Kurt hit the Ace Crusher)- “Someone who can come up with a new move like that”- It’s a f*cking ACE CRUSHER! Never mind that it has been used for years, but both DDP and Homicide used the move IN TNA! It’s not a “new move!”
7. Taz- “I think there was a key inside that lock, and Jarrett was trying to get the key out of the lock to unlock it”- that’s not how locks work! You need to have the key IN THE LOCK in order to unlock it!
Come on, TNA. Give BRM a birthday present by actually putting on a good show.
XSCAPE MATCH for #1 Contedership to the TNA X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal vs. Max Buck vs. Jeremy Buck vs. Robbie E vs. Amazing Red vs. Brian Kendrick vs. Suicide-7/10. The bump at the end was weird. A low bow hidden from the ref would have accomplished the same thing without relying on a ref bump-type scenario for the 27th week in a row. I can’t deny that it got heat, though.
Having no bell for the eliminations was a little weird, as was Sabin hitting the Cradle Shock, then using Homicide’s Lariat to get the pin.
BISCHOFF PROMO- No. NO Please tell me he did not just say that Hogan wants the TNA World Title, and that it will happen tonight.
Props to the fans who started the “WE WANT WRESTLING!” chant during this waste of time.
STEINER & CRIMSON PROMOS- GREAT!
STEEL CAGE MATCH: Ink Inc. vs. Scott Steiner & Crimson vs. EY & OJ vs. The British Invasion- 5.5/10
MADISON & TARA SEGMENT- Good stuff, but having Tara at ringside tonight wouldn’t matter anyway, because it is a STEEL: CAGE MATCH- DUD!
WHAT THE F*CK! WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS BLOWOFF FOR SIX MONTHS… AND THEY MAKE IT A SQUASH? WHAT THE F*CK IS WRONG WITH THIS COMPANY? This is STING vs. JEFF II. I am not saying that there were any drugs involved or anything. I am saying that this is a PPV match that has been hyped for a while… and they give us a squash! WHAT THE F*CK!
MATT MORGAN PROMO- Good.
THE POPE vs. SAMOA JOE- 7.25/10. See what happens when you give these guys time?
MEXICAN AMERICA SEGMENT- Okay, whatever. I have no idea what the hell they were saying. The way to do this would have been exactly the way that they stated/ Have Hernandez cut the promo in Spanish, then do the “I’m going to dumb it down for you” line, then have him cut it in English. Instead, a whole bunch of people just grabbed at the mic. Props to Sarita for grabbing the mic away from Rosita when she started sounding like a stereotypical black woman.
STEEL CAGE MATCH: Matt Morgan vs. Hernandez (w/Mexican America)- 6.5/10
SARITA & ROSITA PROMO- BAD! Her complaints are baseless. She hasn’t beaten every Knockout in the company, and there was no bad officiating in the Morgan vs. Hernandez match. Then Velvet Sky, who has no beef with her at all, comes out and shuts her up. This time should have been given to a match.
ULTRA-MALE RULES MATCH: Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Jarrett- 7.75/10. All of the awkwardness with the key and the referee prevented this from being an 8/10.
Ummm… If the first fall is a submissions match, why is the referee COUNTING KURT’S SHOULDERS DOWN? And what the hell was up with the ambiguity about the second fall. The ref should have signaled for the fall right away. The only reason that they did this was so Jarrett could attack Kurt from behind to start the third fall. That was moronic. The stuff with Karen was good, though.
The fact that this isn’t the main event scares me. Usually, when a match that seems like it should be the main event isn’t, it means that booker is doing something that he is unsure if it will go over well, so he doesn’t want to put it on last incase it flops (not that it always does flop: the first Joe vs. Punk draw was done like this).
STEEL CAGE MATCH FOR THE TNA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE: Sting(c) vs. Mr. Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam- I was right. 6/10. I was really enjoying this match until Hogan came down and ruined it. I actually took points away for the transparent swerve and crappy finish.
They’ve spent how much time building this match up… and it only went 8 minutes? And a 8 minute match doesn’t need a f*cking video reacp!
LETHAL LOCKDOWN MATCH: Fortune (Daniels, Kazarian, & Beer Money) vs. Immortal (Ric Flair, Abyss, Matt Hardy, & Bully Ray)- 7.5/10. Just barely scrapes by as a main event. This match didn’t do it for me, and mostly because of Flair. That was the WEAKEST TAPOUT EVER. Anyone who knows the move knows that Roode didn’t even have it locked in correctly! And this wasn’t even a finisher!
Dear Ric, if you don’t want someone to hit you, it is probably a better idea to GET UP AND RUN AROUND, rather than kneeling down and staying in one place.
Flair bleeds a lot. Who saw that coming? And why the hell was Flair wrestling in suit pants? He knew about this match for weeks. BRING YOUR GEAR!
I also didn’t like Matt & Daniels on top of the cage… or I guess I really didn’t like the way the cameras got it. Most of the time they were up there, we weren’t seeing anything in the ring, but were hearing all of the sounds. It just made me feel like I was missing a lot of wrestling
Overall, this show was surprisingly good (for the most part). It was a lot like Genesis. Nothing great, but a lot of stuff that was pretty solid. Much better than the usual drivel from TNA. I am very annoyed at the fact that both title matches utterly sucked, though.
Stupid Announcer Quotes:
1. Just when I thought he had learned his lesson, Taz once again misuses the term “sacrificial lamb.”
2. Tenay- “It’s all about the strikes when it comes to Samoa Joe, isn’t?”- And you and Taz spent the last month building this up as “the ‘Street Style’ of the Pope vs. the ‘Submission Style’ of Samoa Joe.”
3. Taz- “That clothesline with that Back Sweep”- It’s an STO! Anyone who has ever played an SvR game or knows anything about wrestling knows this. Why is this man an announcer?
4. Tenay and Taz up Angle vs. Jarrett as being “the most personal grudge in the history of the business”- Tommy vs. Raven? Raven vs. Sandman? Triple H vs. HBK? HBK vs. Bret? Homicide vs. Corino? Dusty vs. Sullivan? Quack vs. STIGMA? A bunch of others that I am sure I am missing?
5. Taz- “This late in the matchup,. Most guys would be too exhausted to lift a guy up there”- it’s only been ten minutes!
6. Tenay (after Kurt hit the Ace Crusher)- “Someone who can come up with a new move like that”- It’s a f*cking ACE CRUSHER! Never mind that it has been used for years, but both DDP and Homicide used the move IN TNA! It’s not a “new move!”
7. Taz- “I think there was a key inside that lock, and Jarrett was trying to get the key out of the lock to unlock it”- that’s not how locks work! You need to have the key IN THE LOCK in order to unlock it!