CHIKARA Grape American Bash
CHIKARA Grape American Bash (4/17/2005)- Pittston, PA
CHRIS HERO PROMO- great, but it would have been more enjoyable if we couldn’t hear people chatting in the background during the beginning.
LARRY SWEENEY, THE SHARECROPPER, & CHANDLER MCCLURE vs. TRIK DAVIS, EMIL SITOCI, & MICKIE KNUCKLES- 2/10
They started off with pre-match trash-talking and antics which were great from Larry Sweeney, but stunk when everyone else tried to get involved. At that point it became so annoying and boring that a fan (AT A CHIKARA SHOW, known for the most polite fans in the world), shouted â€"how about a wrestling match?â€
They had a wrestling match and it was okay aside from a botch by Sharecropper and Davis. Unfortunately, aside from Sweeney, none of these guys had any charisma at all (Sitoci and Mickie had a little). During the finishing sequence, Mickie just went nuts on McClure and it looked like she was shooting on him. You could just see her in the background on the floor working an armlock on this guy… or at least I hope she was working. As I said, the match was okay, but I just have no desire to see any of these wrestlers ever again aside from Sweeney and Mickie.
DAVEY ANDREWS vs. GRAN AKUMA- 5.5/10
Wow. It’s been so long that I almost forgot that Akuma had ever worn a mask. Davey Andrews was stll a student at the ROH Wrestling School at this time. This match was much longer and much better than any match he was ever even given the chance to have in ROH. If you’re wondering why the ROH Wrestling School never produced anyone anything close to notability aside from Rhett Titus, (I love Grizzly Redwood, but the dude was always a jobber) THIS is a big reason why.
SHANE STORM vs. CLAUDIO CASTAGNOLI- 7.25/10
I have no idea why, but this match was billed as a â€"fans bring the fans match.†Upon hearing this, Eddie Kingston immediately said â€"and they didn’t bring a lot.†It took him a few seconds, but Kingston did eventually realize that he had just COMPLETELY BURIED THE MATCH, THE SHOW, AND THE COMPANY, and tried to rectify this error by quickly adding â€"I’m kidding.†That is some Taz-level sh*t right there. In what I’m sure was a complete and total coincidence, Larry Sweeney replaced Kingston on commentary soon thereafter… and when I say soon, I mean about a minute into the match. Of course, what they provided probably wasn’t what Quack was looking for either. One of the first things Prazak did was ask Sweeney â€"do you think he’s sexy, and do you want his body.†Yeah. This is feeling less and less like CHIKARA commentary and more like a really crappy version of PWG commentary (they actually got much better after that).
The match was great, and the crowd was much more into it than the first two match. The comedy with the stop sign felt a bit out of place, but other than that, everything else worked.
CROSSBONES, MANO METALICO, RORSCHACH & SHANE HAGADORN vs. DANNY RAGE, JC RYDER, LANCE STEEL, JOLLY ROGER- 4/10
Well… Kingston was back on commentary, and was immediately shouting stuff totally unrelated to anything DURING THE INTRODUCTIONS. Hagadorn’s haircut was just… too ugly to describe. We got random shenanigans, which would have been fine except that it took the form of the babyaces cheating. The match then became random action. It wasn’t poorly worked or anything… it just wasn’t exciting in any way.
Mickie Knuckles and Sabian both dropped in to say a random sentence on commentary, then disappeared back into the aether. Wait… no… Mickie Knuckles is back to put one of these dorks over as being hot. Ian’s gonna be pissed…
MIKE QUACKENBUSH vs. ARIK CANNON- 7.5/10
The commentary was decent for the first few seconds of this one because Bryce Remsburg replaced Kingston on commentary. Kingston came back, but Bryce kept them focused.
The match itself was great! There was a lot of anger, and it felt like it could boil over at any moment, and they were fighting to keep in control of themselves and to keep it a wrestling match and not a brawl.
CHEECH & CLOUDY vs. NAT TURNER & ANTHONY FRANCO- 6.75/10
Franco and Turner were also ROH Wrestling School students, and like Andrews, they were also given much more time than they were ever given in ROH. Possibly more time than all of their ROH matches combined. And I’m not even kidding about that.
YOUNG LIONS CUP MATCH: Jigsaw(c) vs. Chris Hero- 6.75/10
They were in the middle of telling this GREAT story where Hero worked over Jigsaw’s arm, so he had to make his comeback with his legs, using hurricanranas and kicks and double-stomps… and then, just as Jigsaw’s comeback seems to be getting into full swing, Claudio and Cannon hit the ring and attacked Jigsaw for the blatant DQ. Quack tried to make the save, but ate a European uppercut to the back of the head. KOW took Jigsaw’s mask off, but between him and Quack, they were able to hide his face… though they did so at the cost of opening themselves up to several vicious stomps.
CHRIS HERO PROMO- he challenges Quack to a tag match at Aniversario weekend, which each guy picking a partner.
Eddie Kingston and Dave Prazak were on commentary for this show, and they were terrible. For most of the show, it was clear that they just did not give crap- especially Kingston, who just tried to get Prazak to respond to his stupid random comments. At one point he even said the following sentence: â€"I learned from Excalibur that they used to call porn movies ‘blue movies.’†He then dropped the name of what, based on an internet search, appears to be a pornographic website. Yeah. He GAVE OUT THE NAME OF A PORN SITE ON A CHIKARA SHOW. How the f*ck was he not fired after this?
An okay show from CHIKARA. There were some great matches on here, but you had to slog through a lot of dull stuff to get to them.
BONUS MATCHES:
Both of these matches are from CHIKARA Retribution Rumble of Rebellion and Revenge to Remember.
EDDIE KINGSTON vs. CHRIS HERO- 8/10
A REALLY STIFF match, with a great babyface-heel dynamic. We also got a decent post-match angle.
CROSSBONES, LARRY SWEENEY, RORSCHACH, & SPYRAZUL vs. JIGSAW, JOLLY ROGER, MISTER ZERO, & SHANE STORM- 6/10
Action happened. The only real story seemed to be Spyrazul always breaking up pins to save Sweeney, which really doesn’t make sense when you consider how the whole Spyrazul thing wound up going. We also got a post-match angle here that eventually led to the first ever CHIKARA Torneo Cibernetico.
CHRIS HERO PROMO- great, but it would have been more enjoyable if we couldn’t hear people chatting in the background during the beginning.
LARRY SWEENEY, THE SHARECROPPER, & CHANDLER MCCLURE vs. TRIK DAVIS, EMIL SITOCI, & MICKIE KNUCKLES- 2/10
They started off with pre-match trash-talking and antics which were great from Larry Sweeney, but stunk when everyone else tried to get involved. At that point it became so annoying and boring that a fan (AT A CHIKARA SHOW, known for the most polite fans in the world), shouted â€"how about a wrestling match?â€
They had a wrestling match and it was okay aside from a botch by Sharecropper and Davis. Unfortunately, aside from Sweeney, none of these guys had any charisma at all (Sitoci and Mickie had a little). During the finishing sequence, Mickie just went nuts on McClure and it looked like she was shooting on him. You could just see her in the background on the floor working an armlock on this guy… or at least I hope she was working. As I said, the match was okay, but I just have no desire to see any of these wrestlers ever again aside from Sweeney and Mickie.
DAVEY ANDREWS vs. GRAN AKUMA- 5.5/10
Wow. It’s been so long that I almost forgot that Akuma had ever worn a mask. Davey Andrews was stll a student at the ROH Wrestling School at this time. This match was much longer and much better than any match he was ever even given the chance to have in ROH. If you’re wondering why the ROH Wrestling School never produced anyone anything close to notability aside from Rhett Titus, (I love Grizzly Redwood, but the dude was always a jobber) THIS is a big reason why.
SHANE STORM vs. CLAUDIO CASTAGNOLI- 7.25/10
I have no idea why, but this match was billed as a â€"fans bring the fans match.†Upon hearing this, Eddie Kingston immediately said â€"and they didn’t bring a lot.†It took him a few seconds, but Kingston did eventually realize that he had just COMPLETELY BURIED THE MATCH, THE SHOW, AND THE COMPANY, and tried to rectify this error by quickly adding â€"I’m kidding.†That is some Taz-level sh*t right there. In what I’m sure was a complete and total coincidence, Larry Sweeney replaced Kingston on commentary soon thereafter… and when I say soon, I mean about a minute into the match. Of course, what they provided probably wasn’t what Quack was looking for either. One of the first things Prazak did was ask Sweeney â€"do you think he’s sexy, and do you want his body.†Yeah. This is feeling less and less like CHIKARA commentary and more like a really crappy version of PWG commentary (they actually got much better after that).
The match was great, and the crowd was much more into it than the first two match. The comedy with the stop sign felt a bit out of place, but other than that, everything else worked.
CROSSBONES, MANO METALICO, RORSCHACH & SHANE HAGADORN vs. DANNY RAGE, JC RYDER, LANCE STEEL, JOLLY ROGER- 4/10
Well… Kingston was back on commentary, and was immediately shouting stuff totally unrelated to anything DURING THE INTRODUCTIONS. Hagadorn’s haircut was just… too ugly to describe. We got random shenanigans, which would have been fine except that it took the form of the babyaces cheating. The match then became random action. It wasn’t poorly worked or anything… it just wasn’t exciting in any way.
Mickie Knuckles and Sabian both dropped in to say a random sentence on commentary, then disappeared back into the aether. Wait… no… Mickie Knuckles is back to put one of these dorks over as being hot. Ian’s gonna be pissed…
MIKE QUACKENBUSH vs. ARIK CANNON- 7.5/10
The commentary was decent for the first few seconds of this one because Bryce Remsburg replaced Kingston on commentary. Kingston came back, but Bryce kept them focused.
The match itself was great! There was a lot of anger, and it felt like it could boil over at any moment, and they were fighting to keep in control of themselves and to keep it a wrestling match and not a brawl.
CHEECH & CLOUDY vs. NAT TURNER & ANTHONY FRANCO- 6.75/10
Franco and Turner were also ROH Wrestling School students, and like Andrews, they were also given much more time than they were ever given in ROH. Possibly more time than all of their ROH matches combined. And I’m not even kidding about that.
YOUNG LIONS CUP MATCH: Jigsaw(c) vs. Chris Hero- 6.75/10
They were in the middle of telling this GREAT story where Hero worked over Jigsaw’s arm, so he had to make his comeback with his legs, using hurricanranas and kicks and double-stomps… and then, just as Jigsaw’s comeback seems to be getting into full swing, Claudio and Cannon hit the ring and attacked Jigsaw for the blatant DQ. Quack tried to make the save, but ate a European uppercut to the back of the head. KOW took Jigsaw’s mask off, but between him and Quack, they were able to hide his face… though they did so at the cost of opening themselves up to several vicious stomps.
CHRIS HERO PROMO- he challenges Quack to a tag match at Aniversario weekend, which each guy picking a partner.
Eddie Kingston and Dave Prazak were on commentary for this show, and they were terrible. For most of the show, it was clear that they just did not give crap- especially Kingston, who just tried to get Prazak to respond to his stupid random comments. At one point he even said the following sentence: â€"I learned from Excalibur that they used to call porn movies ‘blue movies.’†He then dropped the name of what, based on an internet search, appears to be a pornographic website. Yeah. He GAVE OUT THE NAME OF A PORN SITE ON A CHIKARA SHOW. How the f*ck was he not fired after this?
An okay show from CHIKARA. There were some great matches on here, but you had to slog through a lot of dull stuff to get to them.
BONUS MATCHES:
Both of these matches are from CHIKARA Retribution Rumble of Rebellion and Revenge to Remember.
EDDIE KINGSTON vs. CHRIS HERO- 8/10
A REALLY STIFF match, with a great babyface-heel dynamic. We also got a decent post-match angle.
CROSSBONES, LARRY SWEENEY, RORSCHACH, & SPYRAZUL vs. JIGSAW, JOLLY ROGER, MISTER ZERO, & SHANE STORM- 6/10
Action happened. The only real story seemed to be Spyrazul always breaking up pins to save Sweeney, which really doesn’t make sense when you consider how the whole Spyrazul thing wound up going. We also got a post-match angle here that eventually led to the first ever CHIKARA Torneo Cibernetico.